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Kink Your Kindle: Erotic Paris, lust and espionage, sci-fi trysts, stepbrothers and bi-girls


Kink Your Kindle

To give a Kindle book as a gift:
In the Kindle Store, select the book you want to purchase as a gift.
On the product detail page, click the Give as a Gift button.
Enter the e-mail address of your gift recipient.
Enter a delivery date and an optional gift message.

Amazon has really fucked up search when it comes to finding or discovering quality erotica and sex titles. That’s why I started this series. My handpicked Kink Your Kindle selections follow strict standards. All fiction must have explicit, realistic sex within rich storylines that are framed by excellent storytelling, as well as complex and compelling characters. Sex acts can range from sweetly romantic to thoughtfully quick and dirty. All nonfiction must be accurate, nonjudgemental, and sex-positive, preferring an all-gender, all-orientation approach.

I hope that Kink Your Kindle helps to hack a path through the Kindle store’s overwhelming swamp of untalented fetish-spammers and inability to sort for quality, which dominates Amazon’s erotica and sex categories. I hope that through Kink Your Kindle you discover new authors you grow to love.


  • Coming Out Like a Porn Star: Essays on Pornography, Protection, and Privacy ($ 9.99) edited by Jiz Lee
    “This revealing, moving, and often surprising collection lets you go deep inside the lives of generations of porn stars and explicit performers. It’s an absolute must-read for anyone interested in sex industry politics, sex-positive culture, and porn studies––and for anyone whose friend, lover, or family member has taken their pants off in front of a camera. One after the other, these memoirs add up to a powerful, if ironic, conclusion: Porn stigma is the biggest problem many adult performers face, and it is at least as likely to come from our feminist moms as from prudish conservatives. Once you’ve heard the clear, articulate voices of these porn stars, you’ll never look at a sex movie, or the people who make it happen, the same way again.” (— Carol Queen, PhD Real Live Nude Girl: Chronicles of Sex-Positive Culture)
  • Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life ($ 11.99) by Emily Nagoski
    “Ever wondered if something’s wrong with you? What happened to your sex “drive”, or why you’re body’s arousal doesn’t match you’re brain’s, or just whether you’re normal? This book distills all the latest research about women’s sexuality into something that is immediately useful into people’s lives. As someone who struggles with changes in sexual function, I found the material life-changing. The writing is clear, friendly, accessible, and just a bit nerdy.” (Amazon review)
  • Sex Addiction: A Critical History ($ 21.80) by by Barry Reay
    “The concept of sex addiction took hold in the 1980s as a product of cultural anxiety. Yet, despite being essentially mythical, sex addiction has to be taken seriously as a phenomenon. Its success as a purported malady lay with its medicalization, both as a self-help movement in terms of self-diagnosis, and as a rapidly growing industry of therapists treating the new disease. The media played a role in its history, first with TV, the tabloids and the case histories of claimed celebrity victims all helping to popularize the concept, and then with the impact of the Internet.”
  • Dealing in Desire: Asian Ascendancy, Western Decline, and the Hidden Currencies of Global Sex Work ($ 16.17) by Kimberly Kay Hoang
    “At a time when ethnographers in sociology seem inclined to write sensationalist accounts designed for mass appeal, Hoang represents the relationship between sexual and economic relations in Vietnam with exceptional thoughtfulness, methodological self-reflection, and theoretical sophistication. The book beautifully examines the relationships among masculinity, femininity, power, sexuality, and financial transactions among Western and Vietnamese women and men, making clear the many ways that sex workers and their clients or patrons manipulate their relations to meet complex personal and economic needs. She respects her subjects enough to avoid feeding two most common tropes in common representations of Asian sex workers, the exotic doll and the helpless victim.” (Amazon review)


  • Paperback only, and so worth it: Horizontal Collaboration: The Erotic World of Paris, 1920-1946 ($ 39.95) by Mel Gordon
    “Mel Gordon, author of Voluptuous Panic, the celebrated history about the sex culture of Weimar Berlin, returns with a stunningly illustrated look at Paris, The City of Pleasure, prior to and during German occupation during World War II. The book Horizontal Collaboration encompasses the Jazz Age, Depression, World War and Occupation, and Liberation. It concludes with the shuttering of the licensed brothels in 1946, which some Parisian intellectuals thought was the final “destruction of French civilization”. Hundreds of images, most never before seen in a book, encompass this fascinating but little-known history.”
  • Even Deeper ($ 2.99) by Alison Tyler
    I’m hooked on the story of Jack, Samantha, and Alex. “This series is Ms. Tyler’s best writing to date, and the Paris trip in “Even Deeper” leaves you breathless, hot, and bothered. But this is just the start of their wicked journey in the heart of the city and later into a dizzying erotic foray into the French countryside. Stay tuned because it’s only going to get better! The only way it could be better is a print version to go with my paperback set.” (Amazon review) See also: Bent Over His Desk: Hot Office Kink($ 4.49)
  • Fierce Enchantments: Ten Erotic Tales of Myth, Magic and Desire ($ 7.99) by Janine Ashbless
    “One is struck by the sheer breadth of author Janine Ashbless’ inventiveness, her natural gift for storytelling honed to acute sharpness with rigorous intellectual focus and well-practiced craftswomanship. Covering all the archetypal bases from folk ballads, myth, legend, and fairytale to futuristic sci-fi, well-researched historical fiction, contemporary horror, paranormal thriller, and post-apocalyptic action-adventure, there’s something for everyone in this wondrously abundant, cerebrally and erotically stimulating, perpetually entertaining collection.” (Amazon review)

rough magick

  • Rough Magick ($ 3.99) by Francesca Lia Block
    “In Rough Magick, we have gathered together a collection of haunting, sometimes chilling, short stories and poems about the darker side of love and sex. Some of the stories are magical; some are more realistic and the “magic” comes through in language and lyricism. Some protagonists are teens and some are adults. There is romanticism and eroticism and even horror. What unites the stories is that the writers have boldly faced love’s shadows in unique and gripping ways.”
  • The Circlet Press Steampunk Bundle: Four Full-Length Novels & An Anthology ($ 5.99) edited by Elizabeth Schechter, Peter Tupper, Vinnie Tesla, Lionel Bramble, J. Blackmore
    “Five complete book-length works of steamy steampunk, available only until February 15th, 2016 in this bundle! A discreet brothel staffed by robots. A theatre that enacts your most secret fantasies. A mad scientist whose machines are powered by human arousal. A team of secret agents on a mission to the steam-shrouded jungles of Venus. “Elizabeth Schechter fuses diverse genres with such artful subtlety that we barely notice the genius at work before our eyes. Steampunk, erotica, fairytale romance, horror, sci-fi; Schechter does it all so deftly, blends it all so seamlessly, we are left wondering by what weird and wonderful magic such stories are created. “—Big Brain Erotica” Also: Buy direct from Circlet Press.

spy games

  • Spy Games: Thrilling Spy Erotica ($ 5.99) edited by Jillian Boyd
    “A scintillating collection of eclectic espionage-themed erotica… Ashton Peal starts things off with “The Sound of the Chime,” in which we experience how isolating spycraft can be. Stuck in her routine of spy protocols, Chime develops an illicit flirtation with Operator during their weekly phone calls. Then one night things go too far and everything changes. … In Anna Sky’s “Clean Lies,” Ciara enters a hotel suite disguised as a maid to install a high-tech device to steal information from a Scottish multimillionaire. When she’s caught in the act by the devilishly handsome rogue, she can either preserve her cover as a naughty maid and submit to a spanking — and maybe more — or she can get away while she can.” (Amazon review)
  • Step Beast: (Military Stepbrother Romance) ($ 3.99) by Selena Kitt
    “This book is so much more than I ever expected from it. Its dark yet sweet, gritty yet fun. There are enough twists to keep you reading ‘just a few more pages’ until you realize that the entire day/night is gone and you’re not at the end yet. I can’t really say more without giving major spoilers and this is the sort of book where you really want to go through the book because in each chapter it seems like you see a new facet of the one of main characters’ personalities. With books like this, Selena Kitt is rapidly becoming one of my favorite authors.” (Amazon review) See also: Peter and the Wolf (New Modern Wicked Fairy Tales; $ 0.99)

flight of the black swan

  • The Flight of the Black Swan ($ 2.99) by Jean Roberta
    “The Flight of the Swan, set in England and at sea during the time of the U.S. Civil War, more than lives up to the “bawdy” promise in its title. This is a story constantly in motion, as Emily learns about young love and lesbian sex, only to be parted from her Lucy very early on. She winds up on the Black Swan, a ship full of men who, due to their homosexuality, wouldn’t be welcome in the official English Navy ships. There is plenty of subterfuge and secrets that are slowly revealed, and Roberta slyly lets the reader in on both the jokes and the true emotion behind some of these secrets, which include cross-dressing. There is plenty of drama, love scenes and adventure as the ship’s crew fight to save themselves and battle for the cause of ending slavery, though their own thoughts on the topic are brought into relief when they encounter a former slave, Mary Ann.” (Amazon review)
  • Cathedral of Furs: Ardent Erotica Inspired by Anaïs Nin ($ 2.99) by Lana Fox
    “From taboo eroticism to ardent longing that ignites the page and makes the heart thump harder, no one writes passion like Anaïs Nin. That’s why erotic author and publisher Lana Fox created Cathedral of Furs — five ardent linked stories inspired by Anaïs Nin’s diaries. Much like Nin herself, the protagonist Arielle refuses to let her heart be bound by rules that make no sense for her. Thus she embarks on a journey of forbidden liaisons, exotic revelations, and courageous encounters that society would have her shun in spite of their heart-driven passion. “
  • Show Yourself to Me: Queer Kink Erotica ($ 6.99) by Xan West
    “Xan West introduces us to pretty boys and nervous boys, vulnerable tops and dominant sadists, good girls and fierce girls and scared little girls, mean Daddies and loving Daddies and Daddies that are terrifying in delicious ways. Submissive queers go to alleys to suck cock, get bent over the bathroom sink by a handsome stranger, choose to face their fears, have their Daddy orchestrate a gang bang in the park, and get their dream gender-play scene–tied to a sling in an accessible dungeon. Dominants find hope and take risks, fall hard and push edges, get fucked and devour the fear and tears that their sadist hearts desire. Within these 24 stories, you will meet queers who build community together, who are careful about how they play with power, who care deeply about consent.”
  • Under By Treaty (Alien Shapeshifter Romance; Qui Treaty Collection) ($ 3.99) by Kayla Stonor
    “This story manages to thread the needle … This difficult feat is accomplished through the use of the alpha submissive concept. Essentially, an alpha submissive can be described as a man who is normally dominant, but during the course of the story one special Domme figures out a way to bend him to her will — willingly, or otherwise. … The hero, General Jaden, is a hardened, bad-ass soldier, and the thought of submitting to anyone or anything is as alien to him as the mysterious and deadly invaders who’ve laid waste to large swaths of a future Earth. Kayla does a good job in setting the stage for what transpires later in the story, firmly establishing that Jaden doesn’t submit to anyone willingly. Enter Sonil, a beautiful, bewitching, and (despite her frequently indulged penchant for dishing out some serious pain), ultimately vulnerable heroine as the Domme. I loved her, and as a dominant male, that takes some doing for me to connect so strongly to a Domme in erotic fiction.” (Amazon review)


Wetware cover

  • Wetware: Cyberpunk Erotica ($ 3.89) edited by Violet Blue
    “Wetware ended far too soon. When I finished the last story, Synthetic Skin, my favorite of the seven, I was left wanting far more similar stories. I could easily read far more set in the worlds of Synthetic Skin; Bishop to King’s Pawn, Two; and Rough, Trade as well. Everything was hot, the plots underneath them all varied more than I’d imagined, and the small bits of cyberpunk culture recommendations in between worked wonderfully as transitions. This is the level of substance I want to read in more erotica collections. The lack of any stories that made me cringe or skim through only adds to it. The one time I thought a story would be gross is the time my expectations got tossed on their head. Wetware is simply fantastic.” (Amazon review)


  • ’tis the Season ($ 0.99) by Sommer Marsden
    “I sat down to read a few pages to see if it was what I wanted. Cup of coffee and a few oatmeal cookies later and I was all done, blinking and going “that’s all? But I wanted MORE…” This is a quick read, like 50 pages, but 50 steaming pages! Wow! I loved this novella … Natalie has a problem; the thermostat in her apartment is stuck open and her upstairs neighbor – her insanely hot, sexy, and unfortunately, attached, upstairs neighbor – is the local handyman. She goes up to ask him to fix it and discovers him… well, entertaining himself after a breakup… as per the usual Sommer Marsden read, hijinks ensue…” (Amazon review)
  • Holiday Kink: Dirty Christmas Quickies ($ 2.99) edited by Violet Blue
    “Sure, it took me a little while to get into it (see “Santa/Elf/Holiday themes aren’t typically my thing”), but once I was (starting with “Unwrapped” by Ayre Riley—cis m/f pegging fun that was extraordinarily well done), I was totally wrapped (ha!). Other stories totally worth the $ 2.99: “A Very Naughty Elf” by Felix D’Angelo (“I got your North Pole right here”—nice—and a fantastic tale of BDSM santa comes home to his naughty elf), “Mandatory Fun” by Alison Tyler (everything you’ve come to expect from Alison: fun, entertaining, and sexy kink at an office party), and Violet’s collected recipes and solid advice on sex and safe BDSM play. It’s like Redbook gone Hustler, I swear it. As far as I’m concerned, that’s a damn good thing.” (Amazon review)

Holiday Kink

See also, on writing and reading erotica:

Why I Write Bisexual Romance (Huffington Post)
Pornocalypse 2015 is Upon Us! (Selena Kitt)

Need more? Popular Kink Your Kindle posts:

The post Kink Your Kindle: Erotic Paris, lust and espionage, sci-fi trysts, stepbrothers and bi-girls appeared first on Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex.

Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

nsfwaholics-blog: camdamage


hottestbabes420: Ryan Ryans




Eye Candy: Best of Babes


Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week



Image: “Last Tango in Paris” shot by Ellen von Unwerth via MenDaily.

“Dr. Katherine Goldey and Dr. Sari van Anders of the University of Michigan set out to test a straightforward hypothesis: The more choice women had over the pornography they watched, the more aroused they would become. Unsurprisingly, that prediction came true. But something unexpected happened in their study, too. Women who freely chose their own erotica also experienced more disgust, guilt, and embarrassment than women who were given limited or no choice over their viewing material.”
Why Are Women Still Ashamed of Watching Porn? (Daily Beast)

“Let me start with a prediction: sex robots will become a reality. I say this with some confidence. In making this prediction, I won’t make specific claims about the likely form or degree of intelligence that will be associated with these sex robots. Granting this, it seems to me that there are three stances one can take towards the existence of such robots: Liberation, Regulation, and Criminalisation.”
The Campaign Against Sex Robots: A Critical Analysis (Philosophical Disquisitions)

“Ask any sex worker how they maintain their boundaries, and you’re in for a long conversation. Some people develop a working identity that they keep entirely separate from their real-life persona, and others conflate the two. Many sex workers desperately want to be out but don’t want to endure the invasive questions, or fear that their housing stability or the custody of their children would be compromised. Some of us just don’t feel that connected to the character we’ve created for work, so it seems unimportant to talk about. And while some strippers love putting platforms on and grinding into their partners’ crotches as foreplay, just as many would slap their boyfriend silly if he asked.”
What It’s Like to Date When You’re a Porn Star (Cosmopolitan)

“Adult performers on facing prejudice in one of the most controversial occupations. Exploring the nature of privlege, race, gender and class at the heart of a divisive industry: When the steamy on-screen encounters are over, their clothes are picked up off the floor, and the cameras are switched off, porn performers have to deal with day-to-day life like anyone else – including telling their friends and families how they’re getting paid each month.”
This is what it’s like to come out as a porn star (Independent UK)

“It appears we’re on the brink of a robo-sexual revolution. Some have claimed that you’ll be, like the selfie, a socially derided mainstay by 2025. Other, more conservative, estimates posit that having sex with you will be either commonplace or more popular than human-on-human sex by 2050. Whatever the case, you’re coming — or should I say arriving — soon.”
Dear first-generation sex robot … (Engadget)

“Sangkharom wasn’t always a sex worker, nor did she ever envision herself as one. But, her prior employment — competing in lady boy contests in Isaan, a region in Northeastern Thailand — wasn’t a stable source of income. Sangkharom, who has been working in the sex industry for about 10 years, speaks with pride when she talks about her occupation. Not only does sex work allow her to be economically self-sufficient, but, as someone with an exuberant personality, it also provides her with the freedom she desires. “I like sex work because… it makes me feel good,” she said. “I can choose [the man]. It’s up to me. I can do my way. I can dance and have music, drinking [and] relax.””
Thailand’s trans sex workers seek empowerment, not pity (Asian Correspondent)

“So there’s this essay by Christopher Zeischegg aka Danny Wylde. It’s titled On The Moral Imperative To Commodify Our Sexual Suffering and I think there’s some stuff in there I disagree with. I have to say “I think” because it’s a dense essay with a lot of nuance, some of which may be getting past me. What’s more, I haven’t been where Zeischegg has been or done what he’s done. What I have done is worked (in my pasty-faced keyboarding way) in the same porn industry as him, and experienced (right along with him) certain changes in the porn business …”
Danny Wylde Has Stuff To Say (Eros Blog)

““Never, ever send nude photos to a guy. When I say never, I mean fucking never.” The words hit me like a knife in the chest as I read them on page 228 of Amber Rose’s new manifesto on living right, How to Be a Bad Bitch. Even nudes that obscure your face can be identified by tattoos or other characteristics, Amber warns, and in the event of breakup, you’ll have to wonder for the rest of your life if the ex in possession of this salacious contraband will decide to share them with the world at large. … Heeding this rule would effectively crush my whole sexy-selfie game.”
Why I Have My Face in My Naked Selfies (New York Magazine)

“Imagine that a thousand people—randomly selected from the U.S. population—had unprotected sex yesterday. How many of them will eventually die from contracting HIV from that single sexual encounter? Now, imagine a different thousand people. These people will drive from Detroit to Chicago tomorrow—about 300 miles. How many will die on the trip as a result of a car crash? Which of those two numbers is bigger?” (Hint: Your guess is probably wrong.)
People Are Terrified of Sex (The Atlantic)

“The Erotica Readers and Writers Association has been around since 1996. … In recent years, as Amazon (and other retailers) have pushed back against erotica authors, I have seriously considered giving up on the genre altogether. … I have never met a more fun-loving, open-minded, good-hearted crowd of people. Erotica authors are the first line in the defenders of the freedom of expression. They go places others are often afraid to venture, and tackle topics that far too many shy away from.”
Changing of the Guard (Erotica Readers & Writers Association)

“Odds are, every weirdo customer at the shop she works at, every distant relative, and every long forgotten high school Facebook friend asked her to weigh in on how she felt when Caitlyn Jenner came out. You probably don’t need to add to that. This is especially true when there’s yet another murder or hate crime committed against a trans woman. She deals with that reality every day, so she may not want to rant about it for hours on end when she comes home at night.”
10 Simple Steps to Being a Better Cis Partner to Your Trans Girlfriend (SheWired)


Image: “Last Tango in Paris” shot by Ellen von Unwerth via MenDaily.

The post Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week appeared first on Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex.

Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

[Advice][Part 2] How guys can learn to have non-ejaculatory orgasms that last 5+ minutes


Hey /r/sex!

About a month ago, I posted this thread on lasting longer in bed that BLEW UP.

That was just a prelude to this one though. I knew guys needed to be able to last long enough in bed if they wanted to get into having multiple orgasms without ejaculating.

I got interested in non-ejaculatory orgasms for men a few months ago, but was fed up with dealing with all of the Tantric mysticism surrounding it. So I put together a guide on how guys can learn to NEO without any of the mysticism, and the friends that have tested it out have had a lot of success with it.

Enjoy! :)

Four Types of Male Orgasms

The brief “crotch-sneeze” orgasm is what 99% of guys go through their lives experiencing. We’re going to refer to it as an Ejaculatory Orgasm (EO).

You can extend it a few seconds and increase the intensity of it (both through kegel exercises), but it remains limited in duration and you can only have one.

What most guys don’t know is that there are three more types of orgasms, which most guys never experience:

  • Non-Ejaculatory Orgasm (NEOs)
  • Prolonged or Peaking Non-Ejaculatory Orgasm (PNEOs)
  • Prostate Orgasm (POs)

What’s special about the other three?

  • More intense. Once you’ve practiced, all three are a more intense sensation than an EO.
  • No refractory period. You can orgasm again and again without having to cool down.
  • They’re looong. A PNEO can last 1, 5, even 10 minutes. Ever been physically exhausted from orgasming? No? Well get ready.

I’m going to cover how you can have your first NEO and PNEO, but just on your own. Having either during sex and foreplay is 10x harder and merits its own article, as does how to have prostate orgasms, so I'll be back in the future with those guides :).

Step One: Ejaculatory Control

Before you can have NEOs and PNEOs, you need to get yourself to a certain level of ejaculatory control.

You should be comfortable masturbating for 10+ minutes with constant stimulation (not having to stop and start a ton of times). Without that kind of control, you won’t be able to slowly bring yourself up to the point of having an NEO, and you definitely won’t be able to keep yourself right at that threshold.

If you can’t easily do that, start with the last article.

Step Two: Kegel Exercises

Having an NEO or PNEO works by getting to the point of orgasm, and then flexing your PC muscle hard enough to block the ejaculate from actually escaping.

But most men have a weak PC muscle, even if they can normally last a long time in bed, so you’ll need to train yours until you have a vice-like grip behind your penis.

You do this through kegel exercises.

The PC muscle (ejaculation muscle for our purposes) is located right behind your balls and before your anus. You’ve felt it when you’re trying to prevent yourself from peeing, or when you start peeing and then try to make yourself stop.

It’s also the muscle that you use to prevent yourself from ejaculating, and that flexes and spasms when you’re orgasming.

So in order to stop yourself from ejaculating, you need to develop a strong PC muscle.

The easiest way to do that training is to use an app called Kegel Camp (or Kegel Trainer on Android), which will walk you through doing progressively more difficult kegel exercises and strengthening the PC muscle.

Start by practicing your kegels 2-3 times a day until you can hold for 20+ seconds. That’s when you’re at the point that you can squeeze hard enough to pull yourself back from the edge.

Once you’re there, keep doing kegels for maintenance, but you can move on to the next step…

Step Three: The Daily Practice

While you’re learning to have NEOs and PNEOs, set aside 20+ minutes each night to masturbate and work on it.

I found that if I went more than a couple days without experimenting, I’d be set back considerably. Once you’ve practiced enough you can go for a few days without it, but until you have it mastered, set that time aside every night.

During the practice, work yourself up to a peak (somewhere around a 9-9.5 out of 10 for how close you are to orgasming) and then bring yourself back down to a 5-7. This is called “edging.”

Edging graph

Stay in the upper range as long as possible, but when you feel like you’re at risk of ejaculating, cool yourself down using the STAB technique:

  • Squeeze: Squeeze your PC muscles HARD like you’re doing an intense kegel. Hold for at least 10 seconds, but the longer you can hold the more you’ll come down. (A few shorter holds, or a bunch of 1 second ones can work too)
  • Think: Think about something else
  • Avoid: Change your stroke (avoid the head) instead of stopping entirely
  • Breathe: Take deep, diaphragmatic (with your stomach) breaths

The idea is to become extremely aware of how close you are to ejaculating. Having that awareness is crucial for separating orgasm and ejaculation.

For that reason, I’m going to make a recommendation you might not like…

Don’t use porn.

I found that using porn when practicing pulled me out of the experience too much, and I lost awareness of where I was on that 1-10 scale. By not using it you’re forced to focus on the experience more, and it will give you significantly more awareness of how close you are and when you need to pull yourself back.

Once you’ve mastered edging, you can start to separate the orgasm and ejaculation.

Step Four: Separating Orgasm and Ejaculation

To have non-ejaculatory orgasms, you need to train your body to separate the experience or orgasm and ejaculation.

You’ve likely experienced ejaculation and orgasm at the same time for your entire life, but that’s just a strategic biological move on your body’s part.

Orgasm is not caused by ejaculating, rather it normally happens in sync with and actually slightly before ejaculating. Your body needs to make sure you don’t stop pumping away as you get closer to cumming (since it wants to reproduce), so it gets you closer to orgasming as motivation.

All we have to do is untrain that impulse.

Partial Orgasm Separation

As you’re masturbating for your daily practice, you’re going to start working on briefly separating the orgasm and ejaculation as you finish.

When you hit the point of no return where you know you’re going to ejaculate, squeeze your PC muscle as hard as you can as if you’re doing a long kegel hold.

You should feel your penis twitch, swell, and the ejaculating will be delayed a second or two… but the orgasm sensation won’t. You’ll feel a couple seconds of orgasm right before you ejaculate, and then you’ll have the regular ejaculation plus orgasm that you’re used to.

Extended orgasm graph

Congrats! You just separated orgasm and ejaculation for the first time.

This is the “holy shit” moment. Once you feel this happen, everything else will feel 100x more possible.

Now you just have to do it without ejaculating at all.

## Step Five: Your First Non-Ejaculatory Orgasm

“RRRRRRAAAaaaagggghhhh” *pant pant twitch pant pant “holy shit what just happened”* – you after implementing this section.

Now that you’ve seen that there’s a difference between when you start to orgasm, and when you start to ejaculate, it’s time to make the first happen without the other.

You’re going to keep the practice going like you have. Work yourself up to a peak, and bring yourself down. Up and down.

When you get close to cumming, you’re going to do something a little different: right when you hit the point of no return, squeeze your PC muscles as hard as you can, open your eyes (this helps, not sure why), and stop stroking your penis.

One of a few things will happen:

  • You’ll stop too early and not get the orgasm. This is fine, just work yourself up again and try it a little closer to orgasming
  • You’ll do it too late and you’ll orgasm + ejaculate anyway. That’s fine, just try again next time but at a slightly earlier point.
  • You’ll have an NEO! I doubt you’ll get it your first time, but if you do, congrats! Work yourself up to that peak and see if you can do it again.

My progression went like this:

  • Days 1-7: Not much
  • Days 8-14: Some separation, still ejaculated though
  • Day ~15: Oh my god I’m never leaving my bed

Even when you do it right, some cum might leak out, or you might have one small squirt. That’s fine! You’ll notice that there’s no refractory period, you’re just cooled down to a 5 or 6 again and still completely able to keep going.

Good work! You’re now able to have non-ejaculatory orgasms. But, as you probably found, the first one isn’t anything crazy to write home about. Which is why we need…

Step Six: Intensifying Your NEOs

For every guy I’ve talked to, the first NEO is disappointing. It will be extremely brief and not incredibly pleasurable.

Don’t stop here. Unlike a regular EO (ejaculatory orgasm), an NEO isn’t immediately extremely pleasurable, it’s something you have to build up to through practice.

The best way to do that is to keep having them. The good news is that since you don’t have a refractory period, you can have multiple in the same session.

What will make the biggest difference in how pleasurable they are is how close to actually ejaculating you are when you have them. If you’re squeezing your PC muscle with the vice-like grip to keep yourself a hair-width away from ejaculating, it’ll be much more intense than if you’re just loosely squeezing a few times at a 9.

You can also try changing how you do your kegel squeezes. I find the long hard squeeze most effective, but for some guys a few medium length squeezes or a bunch of very quick ones are better.

Step Seven: Orgasming for 5+ Minutes: the Prolonged Non-Ejaculatory Orgasm

“What the hell was that?!”

“I… pant have no idea. I didn’t know that was possible. Holy shit my abs hurt.”

“You were thrashing around for at least 10 minutes, was that WHOLE thing an orgasm?”

“Yeah… let’s see if I can do it again.”

After figuring out NEOs, I had an idea:

What if you could chain together and extend NEOs the same way women can extend their clitoral orgasms?

Women can orgasm multiple times in quick succession, and stay in that peak state for over a minute, so why couldn’t I do the same?

That was the question that led me to the abs-destroying orgasmic intensity that David Asprey alluded to.

Think about the pleasure graphs I’ve used before.

You started out here, with a build up to one orgasm:

Build up graph

With NEOs, you can create a graph more like this:

NEO graph

But that’s just having a regular orgasm a few times. It’s awesome, but you can make it even better by significantly increasing the duration of the orgasms, until the graph looks like this:

PNEO graph

If you have an idea for how to better visualize this… let me know

Normally, we think of an orgasm as a point in time, something that happens to you. Instead, you need to think of orgasm as a state of being, in which the sensations can become more or less intense.

It’s like being turned on. You could be a little horny, or sex-on-the-kitchen-floor horny, but it’s all just different levels of horny.

Orgasm is the same. Once you’ve separated it from ejaculation, you can move between different levels of orgasm for as long as you want.

You’ll have peaks of pleasure that you would normally call “orgasms,” but instead of cooling down afterwards you’ll stay in a less-intense orgasm. The spasms, contractions, and mental pleasure of an orgasm will all be there, just with different intensity.

Your First PNEO

To have your first PNEO, start with a regular NEO like before but as soon as you hit the peak, try to make yourself immediately have another one.

Don’t let yourself cool down. Shift the focus to the head of your penis, and use a fast stroke to keep yourself right against that edge. You should be able to quickly get to the NEO peak again, and when you do, just do the same thing and immediately try as hard as possible to have another one.

As you keep doing this, the gaps will get shorter and shorter until you manage to keep yourself right in that orgasmic state between the successive peaks. It might take a few tries and you might have a few misfires, but eventually you’ll hit that point where you’re in that blissed out orgasm state beyond just when you’re having the peaks.

Once you have your first one in a session, the next ones get easier.

Second, third, and future PNEOs

Once you’ve had the first PNEO, the next ones are much easier.

Get yourself up to the point just before you would have an NEO, but now you’re going to clench your PC muscles earlier, and make all of the movements as if you were having an orgasm.

Do the thrusting, leg twitching, thrashing, etc. If you’re not sure what motions to make, just imitate what you see women do when they orgasm.

This is the same principle I talked about in the article on lasting longer in bed: if you smile, you make yourself happier. If you breathe like you’re not going to cum, you won’t. And in this case, if you move your body as if you’re having an orgasm, you will.

You’re stroking, you’re close to an NEO, and now you’re clenching and moving as if you’re orgasming. Keep your eyes open like before, and keep stroking to keep yourself right against that no-return threshold.

At some point here you’ll feel a sudden rush of pleasure and the sensation will noticeably change from just the pleasure of stroking to being in the orgasmic state that you felt before. You’ll be able to manipulate how intense the orgasm is by stroking harder or faster, and you’ll be able to pull yourself out of it just by stopping if you get tired or get too close to ejaculating.

Eventually you’ll get to the point where the reason you let yourself come down (or finally ejaculate) is because your abs hurt (seriously, this is an insane ab workout) or your throat dries out from breathing so heavily.

Having NEOs and PNEOs with your partner

You can go from zero to having NEOs and PNEOs on your own in less than a month. Once you know the sensations you’re going for, getting to them is not particularly hard assuming you have the sufficient PC muscle strength.

But having either with your partner is considerably more difficult because you’re no longer controlling the amount of stimulation. Instead, you’re relying on them to provide the constant pressure you need to reach an NEO, or stay in a PNEO, without providing so much that you actually ejaculate.

That’s why I recommend figuring out how to do it on your own first. Once you’ve gotten it down, then you can work on incorporating it into sex and foreplay with your partner. That article will be out soon :).

For now, work on getting the NEOs and PNEOs under control, and let me know in the comments if you have any questions!

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fluffylychees: The Business of Women | A Lesbian porn noir Bree…



The Business of Women | A Lesbian porn noir

Bree Mills and Stills by Alan, the driving forces behind
Girlsway, created a cinematic highlight of lesbian porn noir that
redefines the genre.

alt porn


[Question] Is it normal that my boyfriend gets mad because I normally orgasm twice and he only gets one.


Our usual sex routine has my boyfriend making me orgasm orally and then with clitoral stimulation during sex. He normally just orgasms at the end. I'm asking this question because we were talking the other day and he mentioned how he hates that I get to orgasm more than him. I was just kind of shocked that he's sitting there counting how many orgasms we each have. So I was wondering if this is justified or is he just being immature.

Edit: He also pointed out that if we really wanted to keep things fair then I should orgasm once for every 3 times he does.

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girls-nude: Cowgirl in the woods | Lindsay Jones by Chris…



Cowgirl in the woods | Lindsay Jones by Chris Lutrell

Lindsay Jones is an artist, designer, model, actress, visionary and muse who appeared in Larry Clark´s  “MarfaGirl” as well as in a series of portraits by Richard Prince. She was shot in the woods by Chris Luttrell , a multi media artist whose work covers a wide range from collage to mixed media and photography. | snadgy

sex (not sex)