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So there I was, blissfully slipping away to sleep after a good boning. The window was open with a cool breeze blowing through the room and my gf had excused herself to shower. In the distance, a motorcycle rumbled down the street and bar patrons walked home, alternately proclaiming to eachother a new alcohol-induced epiphany and loudly congratulating eachother. But none of that mattered, I was elsewhere. Peace and serenity wrapped me in its warm embrace and I drifted into a light slumber.
BAM! My gf bursts into the room holding a handtowel and yells "Reddit says you'd like this!!" She wrestled me out of the sheets, half-dazed and before I can say anything she presses a scalding, wet towel on my junk. It was not pleasant.
TL:DR – Gf burned my junk after sex because of advice on this sub.
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So her asshole father raped her and molested her quite frequently when she was younger. Her and I have had sex but it pretty much has to be perfect conditions, otherwise she will lock up or stop me for going any further after our shirts are off.
We've talked about it and she always says she is sorry and it is beyond her control, which I understand and I tell her it is not her fault. I know I am not suppose to try and fix it or problem solve it form the stuff I read, and just instead let her know I am there for her if she wants to talk.
It seems that a lot of foreplay helps as long as I stay away from her vagina. But even then she won't let me take off her pants some times, which makes the end goal difficult.
When she locks up, she will get a headache or stop moving and some times she will shiver. The first time it happened I though she was having a mini seizure because she never told me about her past and it freaked me out.
She is in to me physically and emotionally, though she has a tough time with words, and she is able to hug and kiss me and tell me how happy she is with me. We get a long really well and we have a lot in common and plus I care about her a lot, I want to help her so bad.
I am at a loss on what to do, because when we do have sex she enjoys it a lot as do I of course. It just fucks with my mind a lot because I want to have sex all the time and getting turned down makes me feel like something is wrong with the relationship.
I have never posted here and this is a throwaway account, I hope /r/sex has some insight for me.
Edit: I want to thank everyone for their kind words and help. You have given me a lot of ammunition to help me understand my girlfriend more. This is a wonderful community, I am sorry if I am not a long term member of /r/sex I will pass on the good vibes you have given me and be an advocate for this sub.
Last night I was going down on my boyfriend, I love doing it and I think it's important to be (and I am) enthusiastic about it. He starts moaning and tensing up a little so I keep going but I can hear something so I come up from the covers and he's on his phone texting somebody. I immediately stopped and told him I didn't like that and said it feels disrespectful. It made me feel terrible, like I'm not important or he doesn't value sex like I do. I questioned him saying, do you ever see me do that to you? He apologized right away but kind of made an excuse/chuckled saying he can "multitask". Am I out of line here? I forgave him already and he was really sorry about it and made it up to me afterwards but still…?