Tag Archives: Sunday

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

““How old do you think she is?” he asks, pointing at you. From the pole, upside-down in a descending angel pose, you see the whole bar and everyone inside. Two girls give lap dances in VIP rooms, the bartender scrolls through her phone, and the front door opens. A blast of aggressive sunlight and hot dust lands on Kat’s naked stomach that glows creamy-white in the red, black club. You remove your flimsy sequins bra and let it fall to the stage. Kat and her customer are a few feet away from you in low soft chairs. They think you can’t hear them.”
* Your Life As A Middle-Aged Stripper (The Establishment)

“A Norwegian man paid porn producers to create a bespoke film of women burning the stamp collection he’d spent decades building. The unnamed man had spent 40 years and a lot of money building up his stamp collection, but he started to feel depressed and lonely. He went to see a psychologist who told him stamp-collecting was a ridiculous hobby, and so the man decided to destroy his collection. Through the medium of porn. With one film for each of his ten books.”
* Custom porn is such a big industry a man once paid producers to make a film of women burning his stamp collection (Independent)

I can’t believe how awesome these are. “I gathered over 20,000 Harlequin Romance novel titles and gave them to a neural network, a type of artificial intelligence that learns the structure of text. It’s powerful enough to string together words in a way that seems almost human. 90% human. The other 10% is all wackiness. I was not disappointed with what came out. ”
* Romance Novels, Generated by Artificial Intelligence (Medium)

“My “sexual experience” consisted of doctors poking and prodding me and men looking disappointed at me for something I couldn’t explain or help. My doctors told me I could have a sexual experience in other ways. But I never bothered to ask them how that would work when I flinched at the mere touch of a man. They told me there was more to relationships than just sex. I figured that was pretty easy to say when you were able to have sex.”
* What It’s Like To Date When You Can’t Have Sex (Buzzfeed)

“Sex workers continue to mobilise, engage and fight against stigma. The hashtags #rightsnotrescue and #facesofprostitution are examples of the diverse human faces behind sex work. But one of the most insidious consequences of stigma is its ability to curtail the capacity of sex workers to fight for basic human rights.”
* The stigma of sex work comes with a high cost (The Conversation)

* Image from: Results from Clue and Kinsey’s international sex survey (Medium)

“The rest of the world may have forgotten, but [Jennifer Lawrence] is still living with the after-effects of revenge porn every day. “I think people saw [the hacking] for what it was, which was a sex crime, but that feeling, I haven’t been able to get rid of it,” she told Vogue. “Having your privacy violated constantly isn’t a problem if you’re perfect. But if you’re human, it’s terrifying. I’m always waiting to get blindsided again.””
* Jennifer Lawrence is right; the long-term effects of revenge porn live on (Telegraph)

“What’s more annoying than meeting a “straight girl” who ends up leading you on? How many Tinder profiles have to say, “I don’t want a threesome with your boyfriend”? No one wants to be someone else’s experiment. Unless you’re being paid.”
* I Went to Skirt Club, a Lesbian Sex Party for Straight Women (Autostraddle)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault. “Marta Dunjó, a design student at Central Saint Martins in London, hopes to ignite discussions about virtual reality sex and whether using it to explore “extreme sexual fantasies” such as rape may potentially rehabilitate offenders or trigger them to attack. To do so, she has created a concept for a set of virtual reality sex accessories, which include orifices covered in United Kingdom’s definition of rape.”
* Designer Says VR Kit May Help People with ‘Extreme Sexual Fantasies’ (Future of Sex)

“Some seem to think asking for intimate details about your sex life is totally okay. They want to know mechanics and details like: “How do you have sex in a wheelchair?” “Can you…?” If you’re LGBQ, they ramp it up even more. The good old “but how do lesbians have sex?” question goes on steroids when one or both partners is disabled. It doesn’t seem to occur to them that they’re being pretty rude …”
* I Beg Your Pardon? Dealing with Rude Nondisableds (Scarleteen)

Main post image: Ebonee Davis by Bryce Thompson.

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

“The editors at GOOP find me “strangely confident” in my “assertion that putting a crystal in your vagina for pelvic-floor strengthening exercises would put you in danger of getting Toxic Shock Syndrome” … I did 4 years of medical school, a 5 year OB/GYN residency, a 1 year fellowship in infectious diseases, I am board certified in OB/GYN in 2 countries (…) A woman with no medical training who tells women to walk around with a jade egg in their vaginas all day, a jade egg that they can recharge with the energy of the moon no less, is the strangely confident one.”
* GOOP’s misogynistic, mansplaining hit job (Dr. Jen Gunter)

“I put it on the floor of the office and started Googling “What to do when your vibrator gets stuck” but I couldn’t concentrate on the various funny ER stories that came up thanks to Mr. Wobuffet and his determined buzzing. I figured I was just going to have to hide it under a pillow in another room until it ran out of batteries… The Pokemon’s buttons glowed blue and the app said “UPDATING FIRMWARE”.”
* Mystery Vibe Crescendo: My Misadventures With The Pokemon Vibrator (Ms. Naughty’s Porn For Women)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault, trauma, and abuse. “It’s already dark outside when Deven MacNair laces up her shoes for work. Like anyone’s job, MacNair’s occupation can fall into routine. For her, it’s a lot of direction: “Right arm on left shoulder.” “Left elbow on right hand.” “Right knee on left thigh.” That’s not a game of Twister — it’s a choreographed rape. “I never meant to be a specialist in rape scenes,” MacNair says with a touch of incredulity. “But I really am, because I’m a female stunt coordinator.””
* Rape Choreography Makes Films Safer, But Still Takes a Toll on Cast and Crew (LA Weekly)

Some may remember that I wrote this piece on racism and porn in 2009, and AVN’s response was to write a hit piece on me, attacking me personally. I am not surprised nothing has changed in AVN’s corner of the industry. ““When I went onstage, I did have my Black pride fist up in the air when I first walked out,” [Ana Foxxx] says. “And I got a large response from the crowd.” But when she invited friends to the AVN-sponsored party to preview the Showtime footage of the awards show, she found her image had been removed.”
* Does Mainstream Porn Have a Race Problem? (Glamour)

“George Orwell is said to have kicked off the arena of pop culture analysis when he published his essay “The Art of Donald McGill” in 1941. Donald McGill was a graphic artist who excelled at a certain type of vulgar postcard with a saucy punchline that could be purchased at seaside resorts in England in the first decades of the twentieth century.”
* Confessions of a Dirty Book Writer: The sexy, saucy paperback books of ‘Timothy Lea’ & ‘Rosie Dixon’ (Dangerous Minds)

“I can no longer remember the faces of the first strangers I watched have sex, only that I was in high school, and it was late at night, and I was terrified by the sight of a penis exposed, center-screen, angrily pink and erect. It was aggressive, erotic, uncensored, and entirely new. Penises are not something they show you in the movies. … Even then, I sensed I was doing something deeply wrong and perverted—not watching porn, per se, but watching it as a woman.”
* Prowling for You: On watching sex scenes as a woman (Bright Wall, Dark Room)

And yet, they still stuff our sex books down the hole in US/domestic search. “Amazon’s policies for sellers in India explicitly state that “‘adult-only’ items that are primarily sold through adult-only novelty stores and erotic boutiques are not permitted,” without specifying the reason for the ban. In contrast, Amazon’s policies for selling adult products in the United States are clear and granular, separating items into toys and games, bondage gear, fetish wear, sensual products, and “sexual furniture” like sex swings, ramps, and cushions.”
* American Tech Companies Are So Afraid Of Offending Indians That They’re Censoring All Their Products (BuzzFeed)

“For kids these days whose phones are seemingly glued to their hands (YEP, I WENT THERE), this may not be a downside. But I’m old-fashioned and I like having the controls built into the toy itself. It means I can access settings one-handed and quickly. It means if my phone isn’t charged it’s no big deal. It means I won’t slather my phone with vag juice and lube.”
* Review: We-Vibe Wish rechargeable clitoral vibrator (Hey Epiphora)

““There’s quite a bit of porn out there that appears to be non-consensual,” explains award-winning porn performer Casey Calvert, “from ‘coerced’ amateur movies to very rough ‘rape’ scenes. And yes, some of this porn is, unfortunately, shot in an unethical manner. But a lot of it is ethically produced, and if you enjoy watching this kind of content, it’s not hard to find performers and companies who enjoy shooting it. And if you don’t enjoy watching it, then don’t watch it. The content doesn’t inherently make it any less ethical.””
* How to Spot Ethically Made Porn (Slutty Girl Problems)

“It’s extremely easy to stumble across material you might find personally disturbing while looking for porn, and I had a hard time moving on when I did. But that kind of thing doesn’t really happen with animated erotica for me. I can see all sorts of fucked up things I’m not into IRL and just keep clicking by, because those fucked up things are happening to a cartoon.”
* Why Animated Porn Is the Only Porn Worth Watching (Glamour)

Main post image “The Artist by Ryan Brown” via ARTISTS PAY HOMAGE TO THE LEGENDARY ARTWORK OF HEAVY METAL MAGAZINE (Dangerous Minds)

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

“On the first cover, a nude man (credited as “Eldon”) sat cross-legged, his modesty preserved by shadows, as an amorous woman (credited as “Lorelei”) nuzzled him from behind. One of its cover lines: “Compulsions of the promiscuous woman.” It sold out, moving six hundred thousand copies in four days. At its peak during the late seventies, each issue sold around 1.5 million copies.”
* A Penis on Every Page: The Rise and Fall of Playgirl (Esquire)

“To keep the lie plausible, I dressed like I was going to a catering gig and slipped my sleazy outfit in my barkit bag to change into once I parked at the location: a dreary L.A. motel. I changed clothes in my car in the parking lot. I hid whipped cream, low-rent titty-clamps from Pleasure Chest and a vibrating dildo (again, nothing fancy) in the glove compartment of my shit brown 1978 Chevy Disco Nova. I was supposed to meet another girl who was scheduled to do the show with me, sight unseen.”
* All the Crazy Shit I’ve Seen as a Bachelor-Party Stripper (MEL Magazine)

“If you’ve been hanging out on the internet lately, you’ve probably seen it: a creepy group photograph of all your ex-girlfriends, in doll form. It’s the New Ken Dolls, a Mattel roll-out that starts now and keeps on going indefinitely (many of the new Kens won’t be available ’til Spring 2018, EXACTLY LIKE YOUR EX-GIRLFRIEND)!”
* 75 Lesbian Ken Dolls, Ranked By Lesbianism (Autostraddle)

“In the mid-1990s, as average American households were increasingly getting online, a “Great Internet Sex Panic” threatened to severely restrict the most significant communications medium of our time.”
* The ‘Magna Carta’ of Cyberspace Turns 20: An Interview With the ACLU Lawyer Who Helped Save the Internet (ACLU)

“As with any modern masterpiece, designer Jenna Josepher and photographer Jesse Untracht-Oakner‘s vision started with a box of dildos. SFW is an art experiment that features GIFs of sex toys that have been desexualized through jazzy design–well, somewhat desexualized. At first glance, it’s not so easy to decipher the various objects rotating and squishing about. ”
* Sex Toys Are In Need Of Rebranding And These Artists Are Doing Just That (Fast Company)

“The fight for net neutrality, the basic principle that all data on the internet should be treated equally, isn’t important only because it ensures users are able to stream the latest episode of Game of Thrones via HBO GO just as easily as they can watch the latest Pewdiepie video on YouTube. For companies on the fringe of mainstream media, like the adult entertainment industry, the end of an open internet could have dire consequences for their businesses and free speech.”
* Porn Companies Tell Us Why the End of Net Neutrality Will Make Porn Boring (Motherboard)

“There’s also the introduction of a new “Safe Mode.” Tumblr has always had a porn problem; adult content makes up a ton of the site’s traffic, but turns away advertisers. An estimate from analytics service SimilarWeb says around 20.53 percent of Tumblr’s desktop site’s total traffic is for adult content. Less than a week after it became official that Verizon was buying Yahoo, Tumblr announced that it would begin filtering “sensitive content” on the site more aggressively and requiring users to sign in if they want to view blogs designated “explicit.””
* Yahoo didn’t kill Tumblr but Verizon surely will (The Outline)

“Yu, a gentle-looking man in his early forties, with the placid demeanor of a yoga instructor, works as a mistress dispeller, a job that barely existed a decade ago but is becoming common in major Chinese cities. His clients are women who hope to preserve their marriages by fending off what is known in Chinese as a xiao san, or “Little Third”—a term that encompasses everything from a partner in a casual affair to a long-term “kept woman.” Mistress dispellers use a variety of methods.”
* China’s Mistress-Dispellers (The New Yorker)

“I click on a Reddit post and squint as the link loads. The silhouette of a woman appears, in grainy black and white. Just as the camera pans over her bare breasts, the gif glitches and replays from the beginning. At first I think something’s wrong with my laptop, but then I realize I’ve just found an example of glitch porn, a type of erotica that combines internet art borrowed from genres like vaporwave with hardcore porn. It’s a subsection of glitch art, which is itself a distinct category.”
* Glitch Porn Makes Being Naked on the Internet Interesting Again (Motherboard)

“Linking sex to consumption has a long history in advertising, dating all the way back to 1871 when Pearl Tobacco released an ad that depicted a nude woman floating above stormy seas. Pearl is largely credited with being the first company to take their advertisements in this direction. ”
* Sex Sells? No, It Doesn’t (Discover)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. “Kim gave the pastor only a partial, fuzzy account of what had happened to her; as a child raised in a fundamentalist “haven,” she lacked the vocabulary to describe sex acts, let alone understand them. But rather than call Kim’s parents or contact the police, the shocked cleric turned to a higher authority, placing an urgent call to ABWE headquarters in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. That, Kim would realize many years later, was when the cover-up began.”
* The Silence of the Lambs (New Republic)

Main post image from SNAPSHOT, hot off the Frameline Film Festival.

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

“We wanted the show to be sex-positive, and the titillating, exploitive aspects of sex are usually the more base ones where it’s a biological function of sorts,” executive producer Bryan Fuller told us. “There is something masturbatory about most sex sequences, even though it’s not masturbation because there’s a partner, but it feels masturbatory in expression. And one of the things I am very fascinated with in American culture is the sex negativity.”
* Every Show Should Handle Sex Like American Gods (io9)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. “The internet allows us to have sex with people situated on the opposite side of the world. To bridge that distance, we use web-connected devices like masturbation sleeves and vibrators. What would the legal implications be if, say, skilled and malicious hackers were able to hijack one of these devices? On one hand, they will have gained control of an object that is used to penetrate, and therefore are potentially responsible for it. On the other, the device’s owner is likely to have overall control of the hardware and, we assume, consents to its use.”
* The law isn’t ready for the internet of sexual assault (Engadget)

(Still wondering why I’m banned for sharing a link to tinynibbles.) “Documents seen by the Guardian, which form part of the Facebook Files, show for the first time the detailed rules applied by the company to police sexual content published on the site – as well as the scale of the challenge faced by moderators tasked with keeping Facebook clean.”
* Facebook flooded with ‘sextortion’ and revenge porn, files reveal (Guardian)

“Post-Pornhub, there’s simply less demand — for paid content, for new content. But if history has proven anything, it’s that pornography finds a way. [Gizmodo AU] spoke to some of Australia’s premier porn performers and producers. They’re struggling, they’re doing it tough, but they’re using technology (and their innate sense of hustle) in a last gasp fight for survival.”
* After Pornhub, Australian Porn Is Fighting For Survival (Gizmodo AU)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. “When Julian Assange was first confronted with allegations of sexual assault—allegations a Swedish prosecutor announced Friday, nearly seven years later, would not be pursued—the WikiLeaks founder claimed that he was the victim, victimized by his accusers: two former fans accusing him of nonconsensual sex.”
* What Just Happened in This Infamous Rape Case Is Why Many Women Don’t Come Forward (attn)

“Once again, cops are arguing that they need to be allowed to have sex with suspects in order to investigate prostitution allegations. And once again, lawmakers and journalists are acting like exploitation and assault of sex workers by law enforcement is a rare occurrence, rather than a national epidemic.”
* Alaska Cops Fight for the Right to Sexually Exploit Prostitution Suspects (Reason)

“The idea of android prostitutes has generated polarized reactions from researchers and ethicists. Would paying robots for sex be a good thing? Is this the dawn of a brave new world, or of a dark, mechanical future?”
* Sexbot Brothels: What Are the Pros and Cons of Robotic Sex Workers? (Future of Sex)

“Every one of Laura Dodsworth’s penises is unique: introvert and extrovert, straight and bendy, wobblers and bobblers, growers and showers. There are contented penises that have led full lives, and disappointed penises that have let down their owners – or been let down by their owners.”
* Me and my penis: 100 men reveal all (Guardian)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. “Federal law requires colleges and universities to report sexual assaults on campus. It’s different for kindergarten through 12th grade, where there’s no guidance to report those assaults between students. In elementary, middle and high schools, the Associated Press found a shocking level of sexual violence among students throughout the U.S.”
* The kids aren’t all right (Reveal)

“… But these days, Not Another Teen Movie seems like a relic of a bygone era, and it’s easy to imagine its jokes being lost on today’s teenagers, in large part because Hollywood doesn’t make movies about teenagers desperate to lose their virginities anymore. The teen sex comedy, once a staple of the summer movie season, no longer exists.”
* The Internet Killed the Teen Sex Comedy (Mel Magazine)

Main post image via SALVADOR DALI’S BIZARRE BUT SEXY PHOTOSHOOT FOR PLAYBOY, 1973 (Dangerous Minds)

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

“At the time our Constitution was adopted, there were no laws in the United States against obscenity. Sexually explicit expression was widely available. It was only in the nineteenth century that religious moralists, such as Anthony Comstock, instituted laws prohibiting the distribution of “obscene” materials.”
* The Constitution’s Complex Relationship With Sex & Obscenity (TIME)

“Sergi Santos is a man with a mission: He wants to make sure robotic sex dolls that enjoy the sex as much as the humans ― or at least act like they do. The Barcelona-based engineer has just created a sex doll named “Samantha,” who is equipped with the latest advancements in artificial intelligence.”
* Engineer Creates Sex Robot That Needs To Be Romanced First (Huffington Post)

“On the Internet, she goes by the name Vanessa Luna, starring in porn videos that highlight her ample rear end. Police believe she used her real name, Ruth Planas, to help women enlarge their own butts by operating an unlicensed clinic in a West Miami-Dade strip mall.”
* A porn actress, a bogus doc and a butt implant gone bad — it’s a Miami crime story (Miami Herald)

“Our intervention strategies to understand and address the problems from these issues must be nuanced and complex. Simplistic answers such as “because of misogyny” will be unsuccessful, as they do not reflect the complexity of the motivations behind nonconsensual nude photo sharing.”
* Why Men Post Revenge Porn Pictures (Psychology Today)

This is fantastic. “In a new survey from LGBTQ advocacy organization GLAAD, conducted by Harris Poll, those open minds are reflected in the numbers: 20% of millennials say they are something other that strictly straight and cisgender, compared to 7% of boomers. The people in that group may be be a little sexually curious about people of their own gender or may reject the notion that they have a gender in the first place.”
* Behind the TIME Cover Story: Beyond ‘He’ or ‘She’ (TIME)
See also: Get to Know the New Pronouns: They, Theirs, and Them (Advocate)

“Other smokers report much the same — that the link between marijuana and arousal is so strong as to be problematic. But the internet is equally rife with stories of weed-related erectile dysfunction, suggesting a dual meaning for “stoner boner”: Either it’s an automatic, insistent hard-on, or it’s a frustratingly flaccid member. What could account for this contradiction?”
* What dudes won’t tell you about pot and sex (Mic)

“The museum’s website boasts that it is “probably the only museum in the world to contain a collection of phallic specimens belonging to all the various types of mammal found in a single country.” That’s a very specific niche to fill.”
* The Icelandic Phallological Museum Is a Unique Monument to the Glory of the Penis (Unicorn Booty)

GREAT article. “In Pornocracy: The New Sex Multinationals, a new documentary playing at SXSW, French filmmaker Ovidie argues that the rise of free porn online has ruined the industry, forcing performers into rough and degrading acts in order to stand out and corrupting the sexual expectations of our youth. … But Ovidie—a self-professed “proud femporn director for 17 years, now mainly documentarist”—seems confused about porn’s past and way too pessimistic about its future. Yes, the industry has changed, but it was way less rosy to start with than Ovidie portrays it and things are way less dire than she says they are now.”
* Yes, Porn Is Kinkier Than It Used to Be. It’s Also More Feminist, Varied, and Inclusive (Reason)

“Until the early 1900s, it was common for American towns and cities to have a red-light district filled with saloons, dance halls, brothels, and other venues that offered a continuum of indulgences in intoxication and sex. San Francisco had three—the Barbary Coast was the most famous—but, starting in the 1890s and ending in the 1910s, across the country cities large and small segregated their “sporting class” into neighborhoods designated for scandalous behavior. ”
* Most American Cities Once Had Red-Light Districts (Atlas Obscura)

Note: Article defines sex as reproduction and suggests pleasure is for perverts. “Experts say that whether and how reproduction works is just one of a number of medical and biological questions related to long-duration space travel to which we need better answers and more, more-diverse data.”
* Space Sex Is Serious Business (FiveThirtyEight)

“Concerned from the beginning about labelling a stranger a sex offender, I wouldn’t publicly acknowledge the insinuation until more than a month later. I would avoid the question when asked, and fight off the temptation to acknowledge the hundreds of messages that would tie him inexorably to my case.”
* How I Hunted My Sex-Assault Suspect Online and on Mexico Streets (Daily Beast)

Main post image via: Painted Ladies and Broken Figurines: The dark feminist art of Jessica Harrison (Dangerous Minds; Jessica Harrison)

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

shasta-wonder-simulacra

“The long wait may soon be over. Next year the first commercially available sex robots are expected to hit the market. If all goes as planned, you’ll be able to take home a robotic love doll—one that’s very lifelike and ready for interactive companionship, both romantic and sexual. And while certain sexbot projects are further along than others, rival companies are emerging that want a piece of this potentially very lucrative robot pie.”
* State of Sex Robots: These Are the Companies Developing Robotic Lovers (Future of Sex)

“It has been a bruising week for Michael Weinstein, president of the AIDS Healthcare Foundation, who saw several ballot measures he’d backed, including one that would have forced porn stars to wear condoms, shot down. But it’s not over yet.”
* Free Speech Coalition hits out at AHF’s Michael Weinstein over “out of control” political spending, including for NII (The Real Deal)

“Produced by Alex Gibney (Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief), the eight-part investigative series starts by looking into the Long Island Serial Killer investigation – which began in December 2010 after the bodies of four prostitutes were found near Gilgo Beach, just 35 miles from Manhattan – but The Killing Season is not just about LISK. While the filmmakers spend several episodes exploring the bizarre and frustrating intricacies of that case, the show eventually takes us far away from New York as Zemen and Mills follow a trail of murders to New Jersey, Florida, Oklahoma and New Mexico, examining an epidemic of terror for a maligned and marginalized community…”
* Why So Many Sex Worker Murders Go Unsolved (Rolling Stone)

“For him, that day in the animal room opened up a whole new world of biological understanding. He and other researchers have since shown that parthenogenesis—the ability to reproduce without sex—turns out to be more relevant to our understanding of the relationship between reproduction and evolution than anyone would have believed.”
* When Pseudosex Is Better Than the Real Thing – Issue 42: Fakes (Nautilus)

Sex addiction has been widely debunked, and this cottage industry has made a business out of anti-porn and anti-masturbation hysteria… so read this with your eyes wide open. Posted here so you can see what a joke this is. “Last week, The Post photographed the disgraced politician horseback-riding through the woods at a $ 25,000, 35-day, all-male sex rehabilitation program at the Recovery Ranch in Nunnelly, Tenn. … John, who asked that his real name not be used for privacy reasons, checked into Gentle Path, a $ 54,000, 45-day rehab program in Wickenburg, Ariz., about a year-and-a-half ago. The 44-year-old Arizona resident had a longtime addiction to pornography and serially cheated on his wife.”
* Here’s what Anthony Weiner is doing at sex addiction rehab (New York Post)

“People who identify as porn addicts don’t actually watch more porn than other people — they just feel worse about it. The same is true for those who identify as sex addicts — they don’t have more sex than many other people, especially swingers or some gay men — but, they feel much worse about the sex they are having.”
* 6 Ways To Take Full Ownership Of Your Own Damn Sexual Choices (YourTango)

“One of the main questions in life is: Why is sex so good? According to a new review paper, it’s because sex — like dance, yoga, and other body-based pleasures — is rhythmic, and that rhythm has a way of uniting and heightening the senses… Safron said that the most surprising finding from this research is how much sex is like other transcendent pursuits, like dance or music.”
* A Fine Argument for Why Sex Is So Good (New York Magazine)

“In June of 1964, at a Hackensack, New Jersey courthouse, pediatrician Dr. William Reilly was called upon to give testimony regarding the dangers of reading about “abnormal” sexuality. In the course of questioning, Dr. Reilly was asked to expand upon his distinction between “abnormal sex” (an umbrella term under which he placed voyeurism, fetishism, homosexuality, and flagellation) and “normal sex.” It came down to, unsurprisingly, a question of pleasure; sex is “God-given act” but non-procreative sex ends with “anarchy.””
* The 200-Year Old Book That Sent the East Coast Into a Sex Panic (Atlas Obscura)

“Many in the our community — CrashPad cast and crew included — are overcome with intense emotions following the results of the presidential election. In this time of uncertainty and hostility, we encourage performers, employees, members, everyone, to continue to uplift and protect one another.”
* Holding Each Other in the Wake of the Election: 10 Organizations supporting queer, trans, people of color (Crash Pad Series)

“During election-night coverage, it appeared that none of the news anchors had truly prepared for the possibility that Donald Trump might become president. That possibility wasn’t in the script, apparently. But Trump triumphed, and now the adult entertainment biz is trying to figure out what it all means. After all, it was Trump who signed a pledge in late July with the nonprofit group Enough Is Enough to crack down on porn if he was elected president.”
* Studio Heads Weigh In on Trump as President (XBIZ)
See also: Porn Stars Fear Life Under President Trump and VP Pence (Daily Beast)

“In true Black Mirror style, we’re being forced to consider something we’d prefer to ignore. All throughout this series, there’s some sort of reference to porn, whether it be the blatantly obvious one in “Fifteen Million Merits” or the mentally scarring one in “Shut Up and Dance.” Without seeming condescending or overly preachy, it highlights the problems with porn, giving us something to reflect upon next time we open up the spank bank — which we probably won’t do, but should at least try.”
* What’s Up With All The Porn In ‘Black Mirror’? (Moviepilot)

Main post photo of gorgeous Shasta Wonder by Simulacra_studio via Shasta Wonder’s blog.

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

l-img_3358

“Proposition 60 looks great at first glance. I wouldn’t fault anyone who doesn’t know anything about it for voting “yes” if that’s all they knew about it. I can easily imagine myself getting suckered into voting for it if I didn’t have such strong connections to the sex worker communities. But the fact is, it’s a lousy law, the latest in a long string of attempts by the AIDS Health Foundation to profiteer off the fear of sex and the stigmatizing of sex work.”
* The “Condoms in Porn” Initiative Shows Why We Need to Listen Closely to Sex Workers (The Orbit)

Hello, the non-boy market for that doll is sitting RIGHT HERE. “Speaking to the Daily Star, Matt McMullen, the CEO of RealDoll—a high-end sex doll manufacturer—said something that has clearly piqued the interest of gamers as well as sexbot enthusiasts. When asked about the idea of someday creating a RealDoll version of the heroic Lara Croft, McMullen was profuse in his excitement for the idea: “A lot of prepubescent boys grew up playing Tomb Raider and were probably thinking ‘wow I’d really like to meet the real Lara Croft and get to know her,’” he said.”
* Would You Buy a Lara Croft Sex Robot? It May One Day Be Possible (Future of Sex)

“Since the advent of the World Wide Web, our world has become much smaller, and much more connected. Porn professionals are no different. When polled, the one thing they all had in common was the need, and want, to be connected – with their fans, their family, and other professionals. For porn-star-turned-radio-host Lisa Ann, being connected has saved her from some would-be awkward moments …”
* How adult entertainment professionals use technology (The Next Web)

“In the typically staid classical music section of The New York Times, readers this past February were treated to an article about kinky sex as a conduit to a more creative life. Georg Friedrich Haas, widely seen one of the world’s leading composers, came out in the newspaper of record as a BDSM master to his wife Mollena, and credited their dynamic with helping him write his most recent, and well-reviewed, new works.”
* How Kinky Sex Might Make You More Creative (Mel Magazine)

“The Pentagon has a group of people who, quite literally, review pornography for the US military. It’s not a review that gives a play-by-play of the action. Instead, a board of military and civilian officials has to review material and determine whether it’s “sexually explicit,” as it’s against the law for hardcore porn to be sold or rented on military bases.”
* The Pentagon pays a group of people to review porn — here’s what they banned from military bases (Business Insider)

“At the very end of the Malay peninsula sits the city state of Singapore, which was once plagued with retracting penises. In 1967, in one of the best-documented epidemics of koro, (or genital retraction syndrome) ever, hundreds of people rushed to hospitals, deathly afraid that if they loosened their grip they would die.”
* In the Late 1960s, Singapore was Gripped By a Genital Panic (Atlas Obscura)

“Orgy chitchat is rare in Healdsburg, a drowsy hamlet in California’s wine country, about 70 miles north of San Francisco. But for Tynan it’s an occupational hazard. Since 2009, she has been porn’s go-to labor lawyer, defending studios against regulatory complaints and investigations from Cal/OSHA, the state’s workplace safety watchdog. Now, she’s leading the industry’s fight against Prop. 60, the hotly debated ballot measure known for requiring performers to wear condoms during filming.”
* The California Porn Industry Is Calling on Its Bareback Defender (Esquire)

“Welcome to Bonoboville, where Susan Block (and her flock) lead a lifestyle inspired by our sex-loving cousin, the bonobo…”
* My 24-Hour Sleepover With a Sex Therapist at Her Ape-Inspired Commune (Mel Magazine)

“Legislators have approved a bill that would block all porn in Israel unless people ask to view it. The Israeli Ministerial Committee for Legislation unanimously approved the bill, which forces internet companies in the country censor adult websites by default. Backers of the new legislation claim that it is a way of stopping young people getting online.”
* All porn sites to be banned in Israel. And it’s worse than it sounds (Independent UK)

“Currently under review in Parliament is a law that would compel British porn sites to solicit age-verification data from people wanting to view their content. Issuing these viewers a unique porn identification number, the government would effectively commission a database of the nation’s porn consumption habits. What could go wrong?!”
* Welcome to the UK, Here’s Your Porn ID Viewer Number (Inverse)

“It’s called virtual reality, or VR, and it’s this technology that game developer Jonathan Schenker has a passion for. Schenker and his colleague Aaron Stanton created the VR game QuiVr — and, as he tells NPR’s Rachel Martin, he was alarmed to discover a female user had been harassed while playing it.”
* Even In A Virtual World, The Harsh Reality Of Sexual Harassment Persists (NPR)

“When Alexandra Fine was gearing up to launch her company’s second gadget, a handheld vibrator engineered to mimic human touch, she knew Kickstarter wasn’t likely to accept her application. The crowdfunding website does not support sex toys and rejected Fine once before.”
* The first sex toy on Kickstarter has landed (Business Insider)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault, abuse, and trauma. “For months, people have wondered why this case isn’t getting more ― or, really, any ― attention in the press, even now that Trump faces an actual court date: a Dec. 16 status conference with the judge. The allegations aren’t entirely implausible on their face. The accuser says Trump raped her repeatedly at parties thrown by since-convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, who was widely known to throw wild parties with young women and girls. Epstein was convicted in 2008 of soliciting an underage girl for prostitution and served a small portion of an 18-year sentence.”
* Donald Trump Is Accused Of Raping A 13-Year-Old. Why Haven’t The Media Covered It? (Huffington Post)

Main post image via 5 minutes with Tiffany photographed by Don Mupasi (C-Heads Magazine)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

bodypainting-festtival-sex-reads

“Michael Weinstein, president of the AIDS Healthcare Foundation, is many things—professional provocateur; contrarian pariah; enfant terrible of the AIDS activism world. But here’s one thing he is not: a reliable source on any matters relating to HIV/AIDS. Still, that hasn’t stopped myriad news outlets from reporting on Weinstein and the AHF’s pathetic, mendacious campaign against PrEP.”
* Michael Weinstein Shows How Not to Do AIDS Activism (Slate)

“Under the pretense of protecting the vulnerable, public officials are destroying what little safety and security sex workers have in determining their own autonomy over their body. Yet again, criminalization and intimidation are being used to perpetuate stigma against sex workers that will only serve to increase the violence against them. Yet again, when sex workers demand their rights, they are told they actually need to be rescued.”
* The Backpage Raid: Misguided at Best, Dangerous at Worst (Medium)

“Since then, Dane does what he can to ensure that his clients are honest about their intentions. He previously used Rentboy.com, but federal regulators seized the site over a year ago, and its legal status today remains unclear. Once the most visible site for male escorts, Rentboy allowed them to check client reputations and block minors, providing a peek at what a regulated escorting marketplace might look like. Because their work is illegal, escorts face a near-total lack of access to the protections and professional services that other entrepreneurs take for granted, from marketing to legal advice to insurance and beyond. ”
* Sex Workers Explain the Struggles of Running an Illegal Business (Vice)

“When I arrive at the 5S shop in Changsha, the capital city of China’s south central Hunan province, store owner Mr. Xiao is struggling to prevent a nearly-nude “female” humanoid doll from toppling off a chair. As Xiao finally manages to place the doll in a stable sitting position then cover its rather large, jiggling silicone breasts with a slinky pink shirt, he explains that “her” name, or rather that of her model, is Magic Beauty.”
* I Went to a Chinese Robot Shop to Witness the Coming of the Sex Dolls (Motherboard/Vice)

screen-shot-2016-10-09-at-11-42-03-am

* Nothing Wrong With Me (The Nib)

“I was disappointed to discover that my dream job as a sex-sound re-creator does not exist, but that’s not to say that everything you hear in a porno is 100 percent au naturel. ”
* What Do Porn Directors Do When Somebody Farts on Set? (We Are Mel)

“Every time a major hack becomes public—Target, Yahoo, take your pick—Mike Stabile is grateful it’s not an adult site. As the director of communications for the Free Speech Coalition, an adult entertainment industry trade group, he knows what the fallout could be, and that it’s potentially a lot worse than another password dump.”
* Porn Sites Aren’t Secure, But That May Be About to Change (Wired)

“At what point does a robot become more than just a vessel for satisfying a human’s needs? That’s one of the many questions posed by the new HBO series Westworld, based on that other Michael Crichton story about a theme park in which the android attractions—who are designed to be fucked and killed—rise up against their creators.”
* What Would It Take for a Sex Robot to Pass a Turing Test? (Jezebel)

“How did 007 currently identify herself on the spectrum of sexual identities? The woman answered that she didn’t know. She told Diamond that she had been heterosexual all her life until just that last week, when she suddenly found herself falling in love with her best friend—a woman. They had had sex a couple of times, something she described as very satisfying. Part of Diamond’s work was to categorize her subjects based on how they self-identified, but 007 wasn’t sure—so Diamond put her into the “unlabeled” category.”
* Beyond Sexual Orientation (Nautilus)

“Over the next decade, the two have shared pages on several comic projects—the latest being a forthcoming 40-page woman-led adventure called Cyborg Sex Surrogate. “She was created by a weird nerdy guy to be his ultimate girlfriend,” Frank says of the lead character. “She’s finding her own identity, but with a lot of sex.””
* Meet the Feminist Comic Artists Who Draw Porn in Public (Vice)

“For the first time, thanks to a bill President Barack Obama signed on Friday, victims of sexual assault now have a specific set of rights under federal law when it comes to the evidence collected from their own bodies. “Beginning today, our nation’s laws stand firmly on the side of survivors of sexual assault,” said Sen. Jeanne Shaheen (D-NH), who sponsored the Sexual Assault Survivors’ Rights Act. The bill passed unanimously in both the House and the Senate last month before heading to Obama’s desk.”
* President Obama just signed a “bill of rights” for survivors of sexual assault (Vox)

“It started when CBC learned about a stealth marketing campaign involving a drug company, a well-known Canadian comedian, a doctor and a public relations firm. … But nowhere did it say this “mission” was initiated and sponsored by Novo Nordisk Canada Inc., which makes a vaginal hormone pill. Nor did GCI’s release specify that [comedian Cathy] Jones was paid to give media interviews about vaginal atrophy.”
* Ads disguised as news: A drug company’s stealth marketing campaign exposed (CBC)

“So: media both reflects a certain worldview and also helps to reinforce or shape it. That much is pretty obvious. If you search for the word ‘sexy’ on Google images, what comes up is a page full of mostly slim, white, semi-naked women. That’s not, of course, what ‘sexy’ means, it’s just that when you take a consensus view on a subjective question, you’ll get a homogenous, simplistic, not-even-wrong answer. What happens, then, when we ask content aggregators to show us ‘porn’?”
* What is ‘porn’, according to MindGeek (Girl on the Net)

““If we want to look for a room to bang in, we fail,” she said, according to the local English-language paper the Standard, using a Cantonese slang term that literally means “to strike something.” She added: “This is a matter of fact.””
* Young Hong Kong Lawmaker Wants More Space for Sex (TIME)

Main post image via MIND-BOGGLING IMAGES FROM THE ‘WORLD BODYPAINTING FESTIVAL’ IN AUSTRIA (Dangerous Minds)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

emma-maris-sex-reads

“It seems these days that one cannot swing a stick on the internet without hitting an article on why bots are So Hot Right Now. As your friendly neighborhood dominatrix and expert on being served by people and things as a lifestyle, I feel obligated to chime in.”
* A Dominatrix’s Review of Chatbots (Chatbot Magazine)

Warning for survivors of sexual abuse, assault, and trauma. “For decades, the ancient forests here have provided cover for the nation’s largest marijuana-growing industry, shielding pot farmers from convention, outsiders and law enforcement. But the forests also hide secrets, among them young women with stories of sexual abuse and exploitation. Some have spoken out; a handful have pressed charges. Most have confided only in private.”
* In secretive marijuana industry, whispers of abuse and trafficking (Reveal News)

“Many intelligent, well-informed self-described feminists believe sex work should never be decriminalized. In fact, the decriminalization of sex work is perhaps the single most divisive subject within feminism today. This divide is the result of a moral blind spot on the part of anti-sex work feminists or “antis.” They conflate all sex work unconditionally with rape, trafficking, and patriarchal exploitation. Ultimately, this is based on a (very un-feminist) distrust of the loud and powerful testimony of sex workers themselves, who, as individuals and organizations, have called over and over again for decriminalization to keep us safe from violence, stigma, and exploitation. ”
* 10 Reasons Sex Work Should Be Decriminalized (Refinery 29)

“Claire* said that she faced retaliation from her male colleagues for reporting them. According to Claire, when someone finally came in to investigate the issue of the harassment she reported up, Apple admitted to her that she was in a hostile work environment. But instead of working to ameliorate her situation, she said, the company gave her a choice: stay in the position or take a lower ranking, lower paying job on another team. Claire took the demotion.”
* Leaked Apple emails reveal employees’ complaints about sexist, toxic work environment (Mic)

“As a sex worker, sometimes I want to believe the Pretty Woman fairy tale exists — the one where the dirty slut gets a makeover, a Hermes bag and polka dot sundress; the one where a rich guy and a broke girl live happily ever after. So I sat down eagerly to watch Starz network’s episodic half-hour dramedy, The Girlfriend Experience, which delivers a trope mainstream audiences crave: an understated high-end, well-mannered, well-groomed call girl, Christine Reade (Riley Keough) who decides to make a splash sucking cock for profit while studying law and straddling an internship at a prestigious law firm.”
* Girlfriend Experience Interrupted (Medium)

“I guess you could say that Mary Astor and I “met cute,” the way romantic leads always do. It happened in 1965. I was 36, a freelance illustrator who, thanks to Vietnam, had begun doing political satire in a left-wing magazine called Ramparts. Mary, as I would come to call her, had retired from the screen a year earlier, after a career often playing soigné, exquisitely coiffed upper-class women. She was 59.”
* Inside the Trial of Actress Mary Astor, Old Hollywood’s Juiciest Sex Scandal (Vanity Fair)

“Because I take it so frequently, Adderall doesn’t impact me the way it does those who rarely take it. I simply feel normal on it, but that’s not to say it doesn’t have some negative side effects, such as making me more restless, quicker to agitation and more prone to bouts of anxiety. Regardless, Adderall is part of my daily routine, and out of all the areas I see it impacting my life, my sex life is certainly one of the top.”
8 Ways Sex On Adderall Was Totally Different For Me (Elite Daily)

“Yet these biographical facts do not interest French filmmakers Thierry Demaiziere and Alban Teurlai. Their extraordinary documentary Rocco, which recently premiered at the Venice Film Festival, is a portrait of the porn star that tries to make sense of his mind. It’s an introspective look at Siffredi, who opens up about the death of his brother, his sexual reaction to his mother’s death, his relationship with his wife and two children, and, of course, why he likes performing carnal acts on film so much.”
* Rocco Siffredi Couldn’t Be a Priest, So He Became a Porn Star (Vice)

Main post photo: Emma Maris by Ethan Gulley, “Golden / SOTW” (Sticks & Stones Agency)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

Day Dreaming Aline Alagem

“There are some really awesome things about being in a polyamorous configuration like mine. You always have multiple someones to take care of you when you’re sick; the weed and vibrators are plentiful at each residence; you get to confuse strangers when you’re all interacting together in public, and the potential sexual scenarios are seemingly limitless. There are also some really bizarre things about being in a polyamorous configuration like mine, like helping your boyfriend and his fiancé plan their wedding.”
* When Your Partner Is Getting Married—to Somebody Who Isn’t You (MEL Magazine)

“Earlier this week, Redditors were given a pretty neat opportunity: Two leaders from the Maasai tribe, a seminomadic people living in Western Kenya, signed on to do an “Ask Me Anything.” Redditors asked about the standard stuff: religious practices, diet, what people in the village do for fun. And then, inevitably, one user asked the chiefs to describe their favorite “kind of Internet porn.””
* Reddit tried to introduce a remote Kenyan tribe to porn. It did not go as expected. (Washington Post)

“To celebrate the advent of this era, more than a hunded VR porn innovators, adult industry personalities, and habitual masturbators came together at the Kink.com Upper Floor Thursday night for a powwow called Traffic Jam 2016 that showcased the most state-of-the-art technology available for these strap-on devices.”
* VR Porn Has Coming Out Party at Kink.com (SFist)

Rachel is no everyday arachnid trapping snacks, just a product of a fucked up, sexist culture that never took women seriously enough so she and Quinn blew who they had to until they made it to the top and joined forces. And that’s what scares the hell out of the entertainment industry, isn’t it?”
* Cannibalistic Feminism in UnREAL (Medium)

AKA my entire life fighting against being censored off of the internet. “A number of her female pornographer friends are making “really innovative, disruptive, fantastic and creative porn” but not getting the traffic or income because “no one can f**king find them”.”
The woman who gave one of the most popular Ted Talks on why Emma Watson is wrong about porn (Independent UK)

“While readers of all genders and sexual orientations purchase romance, the market is fueled largely by women. But just who is penning these works, many of which admirably prioritize female pleasure? In the case of Moonlight Desire, which claims to be written by a lady named Marilyn Lee, it’s actually a 20-something dude.”
* Meet the 20-Something Dude Secretly Writing Some of the Best Feminist Erotica (Fusion)

“The goal of this special issue is to centre the voices of porn workers, especially those in frontof the camera. We treat their work as performance, craft, and even art; but also as necessaryeconomic activity for their survival. Too often, the latter is used as proof of porn’s inherentexploitative and abusive culture. ”
* Porn Studies: Volume 3, Issue 2, 2016: Special Issue: Porn Labour (Taylor & Francis Online)

“… He said the boys fetched the prostitutes “chop-suey, chili-con-carne, liquor, tobacco, opium, medicine and articles used in their trade, deposit their money in the bank and one instance was found in which a boy was actually acquired by a prostitute to clean up her room and make her bed.””
* When Bicycle Messenger Boys Peddled Drugs And Sex Across America (1908 – 1917) (Flashbak)

“Jade, or Carly Rae Summers, is 22 years old with a fashion degree. She’s also one of a new generation of porn stars rising to fame in the UK adult film industry. When she graduated, Jade chose not to travel down the path that led to unpaid internships and uncertainty around whether she could pay her rent. Instead, she chose to become a porn star.”
* Carly Rae Summers On Why Porn Stars Can Be Feminists Too (Huffington Post UK)

Yay, they interviewed Davecat!An iDollator is a person who is attracted to dolls. Many have formed relationships with them, thanks largely to the companies making exceptionally realistic silicone models. A well-known iDollator called Davecat was kind enough to introduce us to two of his friends—TJ and Ldpruda—who are also in relationships with love dolls. They spoke to Future of Sex about how they entered the “Synthetik” lifestyle. They also expressed their views on misconceptions about the community and how robotics could bring dreams to life.”
* iDollator Culture: Inside the Minds of Men Who Love Dolls (Future of Sex)

Main post image via The Creator’s Project, by Aline Alagem (“If Jeff Koons Collaged Internet Porn, It Might Look Something Like This” – Vice)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

spider man anatomical model

This is so good I keep re-reading it. “Mary Harron’s American Psycho (2000) is a lot of things. A satire about the glittering rot of 1980s America. An excellent showcase for Christian Bale’s skills as an actor. An adaptation that bests the novel it’s based on. But more than anything else the film is a stunning example of the power of the female gaze when it turns its attention to male vanity and violence.”
* The Female Gaze of ‘American Psycho’: How Mary Harron Made Fantasy Into Timeless Satire (Village Voice)

Warning for survivors. Some were as young as 16, he passed them around to his cronies, and he recorded them. “In recent days, more than a dozen women have contacted Gretchen Carlson’s New Jersey-based attorney, Nancy Erika Smith, and made detailed allegations of sexual harassment by Roger Ailes over a 25-year period dating back to the 1960s when he was a producer on The Mike Douglas Show. “These are women who have never told these stories until now,” Smith told me. “Some are in lot of pain.””
* Six More Women Allege That Roger Ailes Sexually Harassed Them (NY Mag)

“This last day has been a handful for Paul. A couple was caught half-naked in an elevator. An elderly gambler soiled himself while playing slots and flung feces at a group of bachelorettes. A guest wouldn’t believe snorting cocaine in the reception area was illegal. A little-person prostitute was taken out by the police after performing oral sex on a client in a public bathroom.”
* 48 Hours on the Dark Side of Las Vegas (Narratively)

“If you think celesbian gossip these days is crazy, you should’ve been alive like 100 years ago because DAMN these ladies were BUSY. ”
* Top 10 Most Sexually Prolific Lesbians and Bisexuals Of Old Hollywood (Autostraddle)

Sex advice is one of the tried and true tropes of men’s- and women’s-interest magazines: 69 Tips for Better Oral Sex, The One Move That Will Blow His/Her/Their Mind, Here’s a Sex Thing You Don’t Even Know About are, given the twin drives of sexuality and curiosity, the most evergreen of content. But Nicole Prause, principal investigator at the Sexual Psychophysiology and Affective Neuroscience Lab at the University of California, Los Angeles, doesn’t buy it.”
* The One Real Way to Get Better at Sex, According to a Sex Researcher (NY Mag)

“This may be a cuddle-for-hire website, but it’s not extolling the restorative power of platonic touch. Unlike The Snuggery, which has the soothing color scheme of a therapist’s personal blog and says it aims to “make the world a gentler place, one cuddle at a time,” Cuddle Time Agency is all about the women, with photos of cuddle babes lying in bikinis on yachts and scrunching their boobs together in grainy webcam shots.”
* Whither Professional Cuddling? (MEL Magazine)

“As the debate over whether the United States should decriminalize sex work intensifies, prostitution has quietly gone mainstream among many young people, seen as a viable option in an impossible economy and legitimized by a wave of feminism that interprets sexualization as empowering. “People don’t call it ‘prostitution’ anymore,” says Caitlin, 20, a college student in Montreal. “That sounds like slut-shaming. Some girls get very rigid about it, like ‘This is a woman’s choice.’ ””
* Daddies, “Dates,” and the Girlfriend Experience: Welcome to the New Prostitution Economy (Vanity Fair)

“Unbeknownst to me at the time, heteronormativity played a heavy part in our relationship despite us both being the same gender. This was during a period where I still identified as a cisgender boy and here I was sexually experimenting with another cisgender boy, yet I was always designated “the girl” during our playtimes. It was a role explicitly established very early on, and one that I felt surprisingly comfortable in.”
* How Learning About Queer Sex Taught Me Self-Love (Crash Pad Series)

“We seem to be in the golden age of hustlers. From tech bros to politicians, everyone’s a hustler these days. The infamous hustle is sprinkled across social media bios, WIRED headlines, and marketing campaigns. … One could say “hustler” bears some semblance to the feminized “whore,” another word loaded with connotations around money, fornication and unsavory business practices. Except, while we’ve been socially conditioned to want to be hustlers, we’re wildly uncomfortable being whores.”
* Every day we’re hustling: Why we love “hustlers” — but not “whores” (Salon)

“[Telegraph columnist Rebecca Reid] said: “I think we’re having sex differently rather than less, and the lines of what sex actually is can be a little blurry. Millennials are certainly more likely to experiment, and particularly to have sexual contact with people they find attractive rather than a specific gender … I think the easy availability of sex toys and porn is also a factor: if you’re feeling sexually frustrated you’ve got a much better outlet to address the issue yourself, rather than going out and looking for sex.””
* The real reason why millennials stopped having sex (Independent UK)

Main post image via: ANATOMICAL STUDIES OF SPIDER-MAN, MERMAIDS, AND MORE (Dangerous Minds)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

Before we dig into this week’s superb essays and other writings on human sexuality around the world, I have to say something.

This past week, the Washington Post published a series of articles on the topic of porn, for its “In Theory” series, which “takes on a big idea in the news and explores it from a range of perspectives.” The Post explained, “This week, we’re talking about pornography regulation.”

This was borne out of the attention the Post received over publishing an op-ed by conservative feminist, anti-porn political activist Gail Dines. By running a politically motivated piece absent of editorial oversight — fact-checking — the Post angered a significant number of readers who called bullshit on the news outlet.

So under the guise of demonstrating objectivity and presenting a range of opposing views on pornography, the Post ran its “In Theory” porn series. The following articles were published:

* Pornography is more than just sexual fantasy. It’s cultural violence. (anti-trans, anti-porn Julia Long)
* The anti-porn movement is growing. The public is just catching up. (Haley Halverson, Communications Director for the National Center on Sexual Exploitation, formerly Morality in Media)
* The conversation we’re not having about porn (Alexander Rhodes, NoFap abstinence movement)
* How porn makes inequality sexually arousing (Robert Jensen, anti-porn, widely-debunked Gail Dines colleague, Creationist)
* Who defines pornography? These days, it’s Facebook. (Jillian C. York, EFF’s Director for International Freedom of Expression)
* The case for banning pornography (Matthew Schmitz, pro-life/anti-porn religious conservative)
* Is pornography a public health crisis? (Original title: Porn: You know it when you see it. Should it be regulated? – Christine Emba, pro-life anti-porn religious conservative)
* Porn isn’t a public health hazard. It’s a scapegoat. (Mireille Miller-Young, reputationally challenged Professor of Feminist Studies at UC Santa Barbara)

Out of seven articles, only one presents an opposing viewpoint (Miller-Young). When the two essays that could be considered positive or neutral viewpoints were published, they were simultaneously published with anti-porn essays. Except even York’s out-of-place Facebook rant still positions pornography as harmful. Incidentally, my above footnotes on the authors are well-documented and links are provided as a starting point.

The Washington Post not only deceived readers about the agenda of its “In Theory” porn series, the outlet also deceived readers about the sources of these writings. For instance, its final day in the series featured an article by Haley Halverson which depicts the anti-porn movement as a cultural zeitgeist brought on by public common sense, thanks to the good efforts of The National Center on Sexual Exploitation. What readers are not told is that NCSE is the re-branded faith-based group Morality In Media, Inc., which changed its name in 2015. Halverson runs its PR department. This organization is a thread connecting most of the Post’s authors.

The Washington Post deceived its readers. It presented a politically conservative agenda under a false banner. This reveals something deeply rotten in its editorial department, and a leadership who possess a calculated intent to sway and direct public opinion.

People who do this specifically use emotional and polarizing issues like porn, sex, and crimes against women and children to enforce their restrictive moral codes, to codify censorship, and when conflating sex and crime, to validate the culture of oppression suffered by women and LGBT people. (You’ll notice that in all of these essays, LGBT culture and gay porn, as well as the queer feminist porn movement, are completely and conspicuously absent. As is anything about porn regulation in California, which includes a lot of very articulate state senate testimony by porn performers.) The Post deliberately distorted its snapshot of pornography and discussion of regulation.

That’s because they don’t think anyone will check the facts on their pseudosceince on sex addiction or their ‘studies’ which come from religious universities and debunked academics. Or that some of us will actually drag their topics out into the light. Because it’s sex. If we do, it’s all too easy to exploit emotions around child and adult sexual abuse to derail the discussion.

What the Washington Post did this week was wrong. But what I want you to remember is that this kind of manipulation is where censorship pulls its strength, and keeps the discussion of porn within the realm of saving women and children. Being so straight, it perpetuates a sexist agenda, where women have no voice, no agency, and no say in what they do with their bodies. It preaches that someone else will always know what’s best for women, and works to curtail female sexual freedom.

I encourage you to never consider or cite anything the Washington Post publishes as objective.

#

state Google queries

“South Dakotans ask, “Is it truly possible to understand another person, or are even those closest to us ultimately unknowable?” Ha, just kidding. South Dakota asked, “Why is my poop green?” more than any other state. … Kentucky asks, “How to make a baby?”, and Tennessee asks, “what is the clap?”
* Be embarrassed by your home with this map of each state’s favorite Google question (AV Club, via Thomas Roche)

“Former UCLA student and actor/director Tasha Reign said in her interview with the Guardian that “the porn industry is 100 percent ahead of any other industry when it comes to women in power.” She admits that there are exceptions to the rule, but generally, she says porn is a business that respects women’s opinions, supports them in roles of leadership, and discriminates a lot less than other media companies.”
* 5 Things We Should All Stop Thinking About Porn Stars (Bustle)

“Before Tinder, before shopping malls, drive-ins, or speak-easies, young people searched for a place to meet and flirt. In 19th century America, wild political rallies offered the perfect opportunity. Courting young people mixed national campaigns with personal romances, shaping American democracy in their search for love.”
* When Political Rallies Were for Sex (Daily Beast)

“Self-styled ‘indie erotic film director’ Erika Lust was more than happy for me to stop in on a day’s filming however, given she’s at the fore of a cabal of female pornographers trying shift the porn paradigm in terms of both ethical and aesthetical quality.”
* Can porn be art? On the set of an indie erotic film (Independent UK)

Warning for survivors of sexual assault, abuse and trauma. “For many years we have documented human rights violations against sex workers in countries all over the world, highlighting the fact that they are consistently at heightened risk of abuse. Today we launch four detailed research reports into the situation for sex workers in Argentina, Hong Kong, Norway and Papua New Guinea. The picture is grim.”
* Out of the shadows: fighting for the rights of sex workers (Amnesty International)

“In other words, it’s a no-brainer that people would want to be blown by Emma Stone or fuck Kurt Cobain in their dreams. But how to achieve this is another matter. Many theories about lucid dream sex all boil down to the same concept: Lucid dream is not about fucking, but about emotional connection with the dream figure. The “carrot on the string” theory explains why that beautiful woman in your dream suddenly turns into your perverted uncle when you get too close: You’re self-limiting. The fantasy is in the relationship, the connection, no matter how short-lived.”
* How to Have Lucid Sex Dreams That Fulfill Your Kinkiest Desires (Broadly/Vice)

VB note: Something is wrong with this article, possibly the restaurant’s name. Can anyone help me actually find verification of this restaurant? “”With drinks served in breast-shaped cups and beers opened with bottle openers shaped like a wooden penis, the father and daughter team behind a Beijing S&M restaurant are encouraging customers to mix food with sex. Owner Lu Lu, a 27-year-old divorcee, said business has been good since opening just under a year ago, with young Chinese streaming in to feast on seafood, such as lobster, under the gaze of mannequins wearing bondage gear.”
* Beijing fetish restaurant teases with lobster and sex (Reuters)

“Case in point: The clients who see me in search of fetish wrestling. Men pay me hourly to wrestle with them, usually topless or in a bikini, and it supplies a significant part of my income as a sex worker. Sessions can be athletic or playful, competitive or whimsical. My monetary rates and physical boundaries are clearly negotiated ahead of time, and we meet in a secure, private, comfortable location of my choosing. It’s an incredibly fun job that keeps me fit and allows me to meet a multitude of interesting folks with whom I would never interact otherwise.”
* Talking to Men About Why They Want Me to Kick Their Asses (MEL Magazine)

“This winter, as the election dominated the headlines, President Obama made a major decision: He removed all $ 10 million of annual funding for abstinence-only sex education from the 2017 federal budget. If Congress approves the budget, ending federal funding for abstinence-only sex education—which studies show fails to prevent teen pregnancies and STD transmission—will be one of Obama’s lasting legacies.”
* Thanks Obama: The Future of American Sex-Ed May Not Include Abstinence-Only Funding (Bitch Media)

“Evolutionary science has shown that, for humans, flirting is a key test of emotional and social intelligence. It assesses exactly the capacities that AI researchers are trying to endow machines with: the ability to generate feelings in others, and to understand context and subtext—or the difference between what a person wants and what a person says.”
* How to Teach A Robot to Flirt (New Republic)

“A few beers later, he pranced across the room and whistled like a furious carnie, throwing his dollars on my stage during my set. He wrote his number on a matchbook in blue pen and threw that too. I hovered in the DJ booth until he was out of the parking lot before I left the club because my need for safety will always trump their need for my comfort.”
* What Does Safety Feel Like When You’re A Sex Worker (Buzzfeed)

“Rokudenashiko is a Japanese artist who followed her muse into legal and social strife, all documented in her newly translated graphic novel, What Is Obscenity? The Story of a Good For Nothing Artist and Her Pussy. … In July, 2014, Rokudenashiko’s home was raided by police. She was arrested and jailed a week for violating obscenity laws, which do not clearly define what is considered obscene.”
* Japanese artist Rokudenashiko on sexuality, obscenity and jail time (Globe and Mail)

Ancient, magical spells of love, subjugation and sex: It may sound like a “Game of Thrones” episode, but these things are also found on two recently deciphered papyri from Egypt dating to around 1,700 years ago. One spell invokes the gods to “burn the heart” of a woman until she loves the spell caster, said Franco Maltomini of the University of Udine in Italy, who translated the two spells. Another spell, targeted at a male, uses a series of magical words to “subject” him, forcing him to do whatever the caster wants.”
* Sex spells discovered on ancient Egyptian papyri (CBS News)

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Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

sex work sex news

“Feeling conflicted over this line between performance art and porn was one thing, but adding the unpaid sexual labor women perform constantly through small gestures to the equation, the lines become more blurred. How is a woman explicitly exchanging sex for financial security any different, besides bearing the heavily stigmatized label of “sex work”? Sex work may be so heavily defamed because it reminds us that maybe sex was never really free — that sex is not immune to commodification as it has always been traded for security, land, goods, or money.”
* Where Do We Draw the Line Between Sex Work and Art? (Vice Canada)

“… what are the pitfalls of quantifying our sex lives? Critics would say that the use of wearable and quantified tech in the bedroom gamifies sex, making it something to ‘win’ at or ‘complete.’ And Spreadsheets’ 30 earnable ‘achievements’ (“Endurance Novice” for a 40 minute bonk or “F Cancer” for tolling up 21 sex sessions in a month) certainly underpin such claims, as does Wax’s desire in the future for “an anonymous scoreboard that lets users strive for improvement or bragging rights.”
* The Dangers of Data Mining Your Sex Life (Broadly/Vice)

“If you were a kid growing up in the ’80s — maybe let’s say you’re gay too — this is what you first learned about sex: It will kill you. You don’t have sex yet; you don’t even really know what it is, but you know that it is lethal. That somehow it leads to the men with the skeletal bodies and the blotchy marks on their skin that you see on the television, the men who don’t look at the camera and are alone.”
* The Prince of Sex (The Nation)

Prince was a master of creating sexual dramatis personae — something strippers see as not just necessary for professional survival, but fun, as well. Regarding Prince, and his many permutations, we knew we were all working the same racket, only he with more talent and prestige (and, let’s face it, male privilege).”
* Why Prince Was a Hero to Strippers (NY Mag)

“Indeed, the very man who pioneered American anti-porn activism also helped set the rhetorical template for Utah’s excursion into faux-medicalized moral panic. Anthony Comstock is best known for lending his name to the Comstock Act, the 1873 federal obscenity law that still makes obscenity a criminal act, unprotected to this day by the First Amendment. His moral crusading remains notorious, as he prosecuted everyone from anti-religion freethinker D. M .Bennett to Planned Parenthood founder Margaret Sanger (information related to abortion and contraception were both included in the Comstock Act). Ironically, Comstock persecuted actual doctors, such as E. B. Foote, whose “Words in Pearl for Married People Only” explained contraception. ”
* Utah and the war on porn: Our long national history of condemning “obscenity” as public enemy #1 (Salon)

“Vanmalleghem/InstagramAt Belgium’s Beveren Prison, a new system called PrisonCloud allows inmates to access the internet and rent movies, including adult films. … Some feel that the very fact of allowing inmates these entertainment options is too much. Yet Beveren Prison officials aren’t deterred, saying that it’s both a humane position to allow prisoners’ these options and helps keep them from acting out.”
* Why Belgian Justice Officials Are Defending Prison Porn (Reason)

Operas typically feature sex workers but are never written and performed by them. ‘PVC Clad Vice Girl sopranos’* meet high art in the latest rendition of the Sex Workers’ Opera. Devised over two years with escorts, strippers, webcam models and friends, this project takes a medium traditionally associated with wealth, power and influence and turns it on its head.”
* Sex Workers’ Opera (New Internationalist)

“Sex surrogacy appears to have inimitable potential because it literally reaches parts other therapies cannot. And its scope is broad. Genevieve, 27, used a surrogate to help her accept the ‘unusual’ appearance of her labia. ‘I had always detested myself too much to enjoy sex, because I felt my labia were too large,’ she explains. ‘I desperately wanted labiaplasty, thinking that was the answer. But having regular sex with a surrogate in a safe and nurturing environment showed me I was normal, natural, gorgeous and could feel incredible as I am.’ ”
* What I learned from my sex surrogate (Marie Claire UK)

“Would you trust a stranger with a packet filled with notes detailing your sexual secrets? In 2010, psychologist Anthony Lane and his colleagues at Catholic University of Louvain in Belgium assumed most people would not. But they had a hunch about how to manipulate levels of trust with oxytocin, a neurochemical best known for its ability to induce labor.”
* How scientists fell in and out of love with the hormone oxytocin (Vox)

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

vintage beauty reading

“According to psychologist Judith Herman, in order for society to function as it does, certain narratives are promoted while others are suppressed. As a result, people with underrepresented stories are often purposely misunderstood, misrepresented, and treated in an unfairly harsh way. Over the years, I’ve gotten countless letters from people whose lives, like mine, were disrupted or destroyed after they were outed or outed themselves as having worked in the sex industry.”
How I came to embrace my past as a sex worker (Kernel/Daily Dot)

In sex ed, we’ve been telling women for over a decade not to ever, ever use talc (baby powder) on or near genitals because of the cancer link. Now, it’s finally surfacing. “Fox died from the cancer in October 2015. Four months later, a jury in St. Louis concluded that talcum powder contributed to the development of the disease and that Johnson & Johnson was liable for negligence, conspiracy, and failure to warn women of the potential risk of using Baby Powder in the genital area.”
* Johnson & Johnson Has a Baby Powder Problem (Bloomberg)

This obsession plays out in several forums where men swap tips on how to increase their “loads” using everything from zinc to celery, the purported secret of porn star Peter North, who is famous for his prodigious ejaculations. On 4chan, a male user tested various supplements and recorded the impact on his ejaculate in a popular post …”
* The Men Obsessed With Perfecting A Porn-Style Money Shot (Voactiv)

“A promising new study on the effectiveness of Vasalgel — a reversible birth control injection for men — was an overwhelming success. Vasalgel is now slated to be available to all men in 2018, according to Elaine Lissner, executive director of the Parsemus Foundation, the organization that developed the contraceptive.”
* Reversible, Condomless Male Birth Control Will Be Here in 2018 (Cosmopolitan)

“I experienced abuse in a relationship for the first time at age 13, in part because I lacked any knowledge of what it means to consent. And without healthy queer relationships to model, I presumed my partner’s manipulations were normal … I went to my local high school, Del Norte High, to ask queer students: What would you like to see covered in your new, “comprehensive” sex-ed classes?”
* This Is What Queer-friendly Sex Ed Should Look Like (Fusion)

“What’s the strangest metaphor for gettin’ it on that you know? Making the beast with two backs? Gland-to-gland combat? What about melting your face into a tentacle monster then transforming into a swimming pool? That last one comes from the strange and wonderful mind of Adam Weissman, filmmaker and member of noveau vintage electronic outfit Pollyn.”
* Weird Sex Metaphors Abound in “Dark Tokyo” Music Video (The Creators Project/Vice)

“In a unanimous vote, the Utah House of Representatives passed a resolution this week branding pornography a public health hazard; a crisis its citizens need to be protected from.”
* Utah’s Hypocritical War on Porn (Daily Beast)

“Dimo Trifonov is the founder and CEO of 3nder, an alternative dating app. It focuses on polyamory, kink, and alternative sexual preferences, describing itself as a “way to date awesome people around you who are kinky, curious and open-minded.” Payment processor TransferWise refused to let the company open a business account because of the “nature of [his] business,” according to an email seen by Business Insider, with a customer-service representative classifying the dating app as “adult” content, Trifonov says.”
* The CEO of a polyamorous dating app is accusing TransferWise of ‘double standards’ for refusing him service (Business Insider)

“With one sex toy company proclaiming 2016 as the year that pegging takes off, it’s time to re-evaluate the benefits of telling your boyfriend to bend over. … Broad City and Deadpool celebrate pegging in a completely non-judgemental way. In the former, Abbi rises to the challenge (with a bit of wall twerking enthusiasm from Ilana) to peg her super-keen date and in the latter, pegging is thrown into the middle of sex montage like it’s no big deal; it just happens.” Psst: Don’t forget this great book on pegging!
* Bend Over, Bro: The Men Who Love Pegging (Broadly/Vice)

“We are living in a new sex bureaucracy,” warn Harvard Law School professors Jacob Gersen and Jeannie Suk in an upcoming paper for the California Law Review, titled “Bureaucratic Sex Creep.” They explained, “The bureaucracy dedicated to that regulation of sex is growing. It operates largely apart from criminal enforcement, but its actions are inseparable from criminal overtones and implications.”
* How the Government Stole Sex (Reason)

TIME-porn-cover
TIME Magazine’s next issue goes full anti-porn, leading with a centerpiece story by Peggy Orenstein revealing that TIME doesn’t fact-check its articles. Fact-free items in the article include “$ 97 billion global porn industry” (a number repeated for over 10 years w/no source) and “nearly 90% of 304 random scenes contained physical aggression toward women” (from a widely, publicly, established as debunked anti-porn paper, via Chyng Sun’s 2008 “The Price of Pleasure”). TIME’s centerpiece rests on the notion that all porn is the same (heterosexual, made by a single group of people, deliberately violent toward women). These are things everyone with an internet connection can verify are biased and bogus (check paragraph 6).

TIME cyberporn cover

But this isn’t the first time TIME has published false anti-porn data. For women who value their sexual agency on all sides of the porn debate, TIME done the equivalent of publishing a hysterical anti-abortion rant and calling it the only truth about the abortion issue — with all the same ties to religious right organizations. It’s kind of unbelievable to see that TIME is actually this one-sided and far, far behind the times with the issues. The article is linked below if you want to see just how absurd and inflammatory — and arguably harmful to female sexual agency — the magazine’s next issue is.
* How Porn Is Changing a Generation of Girls (TIME)

Main post image via Dangerous Minds.

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Violet Blue ® | Open Source Sex

Sunday Sex Reads: Best of the Week

Mariane-Brivall-by-Ellen-Von-Unwerth-Last-Tango-In-Paris-7000-3-Winter-2012-2013-1-682x1024

Image: “Last Tango in Paris” shot by Ellen von Unwerth via MenDaily.

“Dr. Katherine Goldey and Dr. Sari van Anders of the University of Michigan set out to test a straightforward hypothesis: The more choice women had over the pornography they watched, the more aroused they would become. Unsurprisingly, that prediction came true. But something unexpected happened in their study, too. Women who freely chose their own erotica also experienced more disgust, guilt, and embarrassment than women who were given limited or no choice over their viewing material.”
Why Are Women Still Ashamed of Watching Porn? (Daily Beast)

“Let me start with a prediction: sex robots will become a reality. I say this with some confidence. In making this prediction, I won’t make specific claims about the likely form or degree of intelligence that will be associated with these sex robots. Granting this, it seems to me that there are three stances one can take towards the existence of such robots: Liberation, Regulation, and Criminalisation.”
The Campaign Against Sex Robots: A Critical Analysis (Philosophical Disquisitions)

“Ask any sex worker how they maintain their boundaries, and you’re in for a long conversation. Some people develop a working identity that they keep entirely separate from their real-life persona, and others conflate the two. Many sex workers desperately want to be out but don’t want to endure the invasive questions, or fear that their housing stability or the custody of their children would be compromised. Some of us just don’t feel that connected to the character we’ve created for work, so it seems unimportant to talk about. And while some strippers love putting platforms on and grinding into their partners’ crotches as foreplay, just as many would slap their boyfriend silly if he asked.”
What It’s Like to Date When You’re a Porn Star (Cosmopolitan)

“Adult performers on facing prejudice in one of the most controversial occupations. Exploring the nature of privlege, race, gender and class at the heart of a divisive industry: When the steamy on-screen encounters are over, their clothes are picked up off the floor, and the cameras are switched off, porn performers have to deal with day-to-day life like anyone else – including telling their friends and families how they’re getting paid each month.”
This is what it’s like to come out as a porn star (Independent UK)

“It appears we’re on the brink of a robo-sexual revolution. Some have claimed that you’ll be, like the selfie, a socially derided mainstay by 2025. Other, more conservative, estimates posit that having sex with you will be either commonplace or more popular than human-on-human sex by 2050. Whatever the case, you’re coming — or should I say arriving — soon.”
Dear first-generation sex robot … (Engadget)

“Sangkharom wasn’t always a sex worker, nor did she ever envision herself as one. But, her prior employment — competing in lady boy contests in Isaan, a region in Northeastern Thailand — wasn’t a stable source of income. Sangkharom, who has been working in the sex industry for about 10 years, speaks with pride when she talks about her occupation. Not only does sex work allow her to be economically self-sufficient, but, as someone with an exuberant personality, it also provides her with the freedom she desires. “I like sex work because… it makes me feel good,” she said. “I can choose [the man]. It’s up to me. I can do my way. I can dance and have music, drinking [and] relax.””
Thailand’s trans sex workers seek empowerment, not pity (Asian Correspondent)

“So there’s this essay by Christopher Zeischegg aka Danny Wylde. It’s titled On The Moral Imperative To Commodify Our Sexual Suffering and I think there’s some stuff in there I disagree with. I have to say “I think” because it’s a dense essay with a lot of nuance, some of which may be getting past me. What’s more, I haven’t been where Zeischegg has been or done what he’s done. What I have done is worked (in my pasty-faced keyboarding way) in the same porn industry as him, and experienced (right along with him) certain changes in the porn business …”
Danny Wylde Has Stuff To Say (Eros Blog)

““Never, ever send nude photos to a guy. When I say never, I mean fucking never.” The words hit me like a knife in the chest as I read them on page 228 of Amber Rose’s new manifesto on living right, How to Be a Bad Bitch. Even nudes that obscure your face can be identified by tattoos or other characteristics, Amber warns, and in the event of breakup, you’ll have to wonder for the rest of your life if the ex in possession of this salacious contraband will decide to share them with the world at large. … Heeding this rule would effectively crush my whole sexy-selfie game.”
Why I Have My Face in My Naked Selfies (New York Magazine)

“Imagine that a thousand people—randomly selected from the U.S. population—had unprotected sex yesterday. How many of them will eventually die from contracting HIV from that single sexual encounter? Now, imagine a different thousand people. These people will drive from Detroit to Chicago tomorrow—about 300 miles. How many will die on the trip as a result of a car crash? Which of those two numbers is bigger?” (Hint: Your guess is probably wrong.)
People Are Terrified of Sex (The Atlantic)

“The Erotica Readers and Writers Association has been around since 1996. … In recent years, as Amazon (and other retailers) have pushed back against erotica authors, I have seriously considered giving up on the genre altogether. … I have never met a more fun-loving, open-minded, good-hearted crowd of people. Erotica authors are the first line in the defenders of the freedom of expression. They go places others are often afraid to venture, and tackle topics that far too many shy away from.”
Changing of the Guard (Erotica Readers & Writers Association)

“Odds are, every weirdo customer at the shop she works at, every distant relative, and every long forgotten high school Facebook friend asked her to weigh in on how she felt when Caitlyn Jenner came out. You probably don’t need to add to that. This is especially true when there’s yet another murder or hate crime committed against a trans woman. She deals with that reality every day, so she may not want to rant about it for hours on end when she comes home at night.”
10 Simple Steps to Being a Better Cis Partner to Your Trans Girlfriend (SheWired)

Mariane-Brivall-by-Ellen-Von-Unwerth-Last-Tango-In-Paris-7000-3-Winter-2012-2013-682x1024

Image: “Last Tango in Paris” shot by Ellen von Unwerth via MenDaily.

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