I’ve just ended a 7 year long term relationship and 3 years of marriage. This was due to what I thought was mis-matched sex drives. Turns out I think I was just bored silly and just didn’t know any better. Not only was it enjoyable (was still horny the next day from thinking about it) , the whole process was very interesting and I thought others might find it so.

I had never done something like this before and was curious to find out what it was all about. After researching legal brothels and illegal call girls, I decided to try out a well established brothel nearby. Due to a habit of over thinking things, I decided to wait until just after midnight when there was a shift change (according to the roster) in order to avoid a possible busy period and to catch a girl who’s fresh and just starting her shift. I parked and noticed only 2 other cars aside from the shitty hatchbacks that girls normally drive. Bingo! First tactic successful. I climb the stairs to reception and after 5 minutes I was advised of a 30 min wait. Upon indicating that this was ok, I was invited through the security door into a pleasant waiting/interview room decorated in a certain theme and two plaques were attached to the wall. One advised of the rates by time and suggested that any requests or extras could be negotiated at extra cost with the lady of your choice. The other advised that no service would be provided sans prophylactic. Of 5 or 6 rooms only mine and one or two others were occupied. These rooms have a camera in them. I assume they use these to see if they know you or if you’re drunk or weird. During my wait, I read a magazine and watched the Andrew Blake porn video being fed into the small tv in the corner. I left the door open to see what the goings on were like. The receptionist/madam was loud and I guess bored but would come round every now and again to check on the the waiting rooms. Not long after sitting down it seemed that every young guy in the town decided to show up for some fun. Each successive hopeful was greeted with a longer wait time. This I found very amusing as I often find that it seems the whole world wants to be where I am within 5 mins of my arrival. I’ve often thought of charging businesses for my XMen-style ability. One of the guys was so drunk, he stumbled in after agreeing to a 90 min wait! He stumbled out again after 15 min I think. Eventually the girls came around and introduced themselves briefly and each asked if I had any questions. The first was a short but lovely blonde girl about 20 years old. The second was an older and taller girl probably around 30 with red-brown hair, cellulite on her legs even though she was not overweight and wearing a burlesque style lingerie set who was nice and assured me I would have fun. The last was a tall, fit, just under 30 and quite pretty brunette who was nice enough to explain how things worked when she found out it was my first time. Naturally, I chose her when the madame came by to ask which lady I liked. I went to the cashier and paid $200 for 45 mins. I was given half back in a folder like they use for change in a restaurant and told to give that to ‘Katie’. Katie was told to go to a room with a certain theme and off we went. She had her bag with her indicating that she might have just got there. Bingo! Second tactic possibly successful. It was a very nice room! Spa, stripper pole, modern bathroom, 4 post bed, tv, large balcony, nicely decorated to theme.

Realizing I was a noob, she talked me through every step of the pre-coitus ritual. I got her to explain the extras thing. She said that a back massage, oral sex and regular sex were included in the price. Extras were considered to be kissing, “the girlfriend experience” or going down on her, among others. I chose kissing for an extra $50 just because I didn’t want it to seem like a completely sterile transaction and she was cute. First was the twig and berries inspection. She sat on a chair, told me drop my pants and turned a lamp onto my junk. She then proceeded to inspect me for any nasties and was quickly satisfied. Next, she told me to take a shower in the ensuite while she got things ready. Last was the mouthwash ritual of which we both took part. This felt like being married again. Jockeying for sink space, trying to interpret her gargling into human speech (which was cute), cleaning up spilled mouthwash. Then it was off to the bedroom. Music was already playing and the room’s lighting was dimmed and a porno that was only one scene long seemed to be looped over and over again on the tv. She invited me to lie face down on the bed and gave me a back massage. She turned me over and we kissed lightly for a while and then she rolled a condom onto my dick with her mouth and proceeded to give me blowjob which I could barely feel because the condom felt like it was made out of a washing-up glove. I guess I’m not used to them after 10 years of bareback. After a short while she climbed on top and we went for it. There were mirrors placed strategically around the room which allowed me to enjoy her stunning, tanned body. We went through a few positions and ended in doggy style. She also asked to let her know if I was about to come. She kept a good eye on the time and she helped me finish in time to have a few minutes to cool off and recover which was nice. We both showered again and then lay on the bed chatting for a few minutes about how 2011 sucked and how 2012 seems to have brought a lot of good change. She agreed quite emphatically and seemed to be struggling internally with some indecision. I told her that considering the amount of change happening in the world at the moment, a decision to make something different would probably be a good choice. She seemed more relaxed afterward. We chatted some more while I got dressed and she changed the sheets. Then she showed me out, through a sneaky exit I hadn’t noticed before, to the parking area with a final hug and a kiss and a request to come back. I left feeling pretty good and with somehow a better perspective on my sexual relationship with my recently ex wife. It seemed to have exorcised some demons.

TL/DR: Recent marriage went to shit, got laid by a hot as fuck whore at a legal whorehouse and left feeling better about life. How original.

submitted by BrissyAussie [link] [comment]

Excuse throwaway account. Basically I’m in a relationship where my girl loves dirty talk/being dominated more than anything. Only problem is I’m not a dominant or overly aggressive person, in fact I’ve been called quite the opposite. My idea of being dominant in bed is (and I know it’s a misconception) a douche. She even told be that he had a daydream the other day where my best friend was the main focus just because he’s an asshole and she assumes that means that he’s super dominant. I don’t want to turn into an asshole, no offense to him, but I want her to want me. I want that to be me she sees in her fantasies and not my friend. I just don’t know how to go about it.

Now I know the main thing you guys will say is COMMUNICATION! But that’s the thing, I HAVE communicated. I’ve told her that it’s harder for me to do this and she’s willing to wait, but I still feel uneasy about it. Help me.

And no this isn’t any BDSM stuff, just being in control/her submitting

submitted by damnnegro [link] [3 comments]

We have a great sex life, and yesterday I showed him that I downloaded a porn set in a school setting, with naughty students and such. We laughed about it and said we’d watch it together later. Later that night he told me he had something planned, yippee! I took a bath and shaved, then got into bed with no clothes on. Suddenly he busts in through the door in a button up and a sweater vest and slacks, carrying my school books, introduced himself and said my parents had hired him to tutor me, . I was floored, because I could tell how nervous he was, but he was willing to do this for me. I went right along with it and told him that I hope it didnt make him uncomfortable that I had no clothes on, and we went from there. It was a wonderful surprise and… gah I’m just really happy.. haha

submitted by jennyy1 [link] [18 comments]

Hey /r/sex, I was wondering if you could help me out here.

I’m dating a girl, and we’ve been sexually active for a few weeks now. At the start of all the fun, she told me that she’s never been able to achieve an orgasm with any of her previous partners, nor has she ever masturbated, let alone to fruition. I was kind of disappointed, as I love to hear a girl get off, but I was told her not to worry about it, whatever happens, happens. Now, I’m not great at penetrative sex, I have almost no stamina, but I make up for it easily with my tongue and fingers. Unfortunately we’ve still been unsuccessful and she was really starting to worry about her being “broken” or having something “wrong” with her. She spoke to her therapist who told her that it was most likely her Prozac prescription that was causing the issue. She also takes the BC pill Triphasil.

So my question is, Have any of you experienced and overcome (pun intended) this issue?

Thanks in advance, and expect the upvotes to flow freely from my mouse.

submitted by shamelessamos [link] [4 comments]

So, I’m a 34 year old guy. I have 2 wonderful kids of my own and wasn’t prepared for the surprise of my life!

I’ve been dating a woman for several weeks now. We’ve had some really good sex in the last week, but last night she comes and tells me that she thinks she’s pregnant!

In my mind, the first thing that I do is scream. OMG! I already have all the kids I want, what am I going to do?

Then it dawns on me…I had a vasectomy 2 years ago! HAHA! I don’t know why my brain went into panic mode, but it did. I’m much more relieved now. So now I can deal with this as a rational adult without flipping out.

I asked her if she was sure it was mine and she swears I was the only one she has been sleeping with. Well, that’s obviously false, because…well, my fish can’t escape the net now. So I told her straight up that I didn’t believe her. She cried and asked how I could be so insensitive. I wasn’t going to drag this out so I came straight out and told her that I had a vasectomy after my daughter was born. I told her how I always knew I’d have 2 kids…one boy and one girl. I always knew the boy would be first and the girl would be my last. I told her how I waited several months after my daughter was born (to make sure she was healthy) before I committed to the vasectomy.

She didn’t believe me. So I went to my doctor and jerked off into a cup. I was provided with new papers to (again) verify that I was sterile.

I really don’t know why I’m posting this, but I feel very relieved right now. I avoided becoming baby-daddy. I avoided a crazy, slutty, bitch. I just want to warn guys that these women DO exist. Wrap up your cock, boys. And ladies, you should use birth control. There are guys that will sabotage condoms to make sure you get pregnant so you don’t leave them.

This has been a public service announcement sponsored by the NumberOneAsshole of Reddit.

TL;DR Crazy girl claims she’s pregnant, I’m sterile after vasectomy, use birth-control even if you believe the other party already is (this includes guys and girls).

submitted by NumberOneAsshole [link] [92 comments]

so, I thought I was into some weird shit, and then my wife asks me to fuck her in a warm tub of chocolate pudding. I of course laughed. then she told me she wasn’t joking. I will totally do it for her, although it really sounds expensive, so it is definitely not going to happen all the time.

but WHY? WHY would anyone want this? it sounds like she really wants a yeast infection. also, does anyone know if it will clog my drain? I can’t believe I am actually considering this.

edit: wow, I didn’t expect this kind of response. thanks for all the suggestions. I am not so weirded out anymore. talking about my wife like this makes me miss her pretty bad. I love that woman, and yes, she is adorable. once I get back to the states I am definitely going to do this. I am probably going to go with the kiddie pool idea.

I had no idea so many people would be upset for me calling this crazy, even if she is crazy, I am still completely head over heels in love with her even after almost 6 years, with no sign of this changing any time soon. I never implied once that I think any less of her because of this. hell, she even thinks that it is crazy. that is why she hasn’t told anyone about this ever until recently. I am very very glad that we finally told each other our most embarassing fantasies. we are much better off for it.

submitted by x-treme [link] [242 comments]

ok I’m bursting at the seams and need to tell someone, anyone! for about a year i’ve dropped a few hints that i would be into anal and he is very…very vanilla. i love him and vanilla is ok been together for 2 years.

last night was sexy time and i felt my SO’s hand creeping down my spine but it was with a purpose. and he stopped just short of my…umm butthole? correct term? anyways. he paused for a second and almost backed down and i told him to do it. and he stuck his finger in. it was amazing. he told me to slow down. *i was on top. so i did and he played around, and i remembered all of the advice from here about talking to your SO. and i told him it felt amazing and was being as positive as i could to get my point across that i loved it. he then told me to get on my knees and he did it from behind. and he played and got me use to his fingers and i don’t think ive had an orgasm that hard in a long time. it was amazing i want to step it up to full on anal. i have some questions. 1) getting a butt plug, will that help relax the muscles to be able to take anal easier? 2) easiest ways to keep clean ive read only the first few inches matter in cleaning back there, and douching is bad period. any advice? 3) lube, best type? IYO? 4)wearing a condom will happen 5) any other advice that could have the first time be wonderful would be awesome!

submitted by iwinthisround [link] [76 comments]

I’ve had sex many times, but last night was the first time I got fucked.

My GF went out drinking with friends. Alcohol makes her horny…and she got so she couldn’t take it and left the party to come home early. When she walked in the door, I said something like Hi, you’re home early…and she told me to stop talking and fuck her right now. I started to say Hold on, let me- and she cut me off, saying, No, not in a minute, right now. I’m not waiting. Then she started leading me towards the bed as we were tearing off clothes. She pushed me down on the bed, straddled me, and then rode me until she burst. So we started sucking and fucking as she told me exactly what she wanted and made sure she got it.

We have a good sex life — we are open and willing. We didn’t really do anything new. But something was extra hot about the whole thing. When she started sobering up we laughed about the whole thing, and she was embarrassed by some of the things that she said. But I liked it.

Anyhow, I just wanted to share what was a new experience for me!

submitted by throooooooooooowaway [link] [106 comments]

After telling no one in my life before, I finally came out to her after 1.5 years of dating. She told me she did not find it hot at all and never wanted to do it. The fantasy was of her pegging me.

I feel really dumb and stupid and feel like I never should have told her. Now what?

submitted by Sammy220 [link] [123 comments]

TL;WR – One-night stand with someone I met online, changed my perception of the act from “No” to “Hey, not bad.”

Some friends and I met a couple guys off Craigslist – sketchy I know but they really wanted it and I was going along for the ride and a fun story to tell, and I ended up really liking the guy I met up with. Long story short, we ended up having sex – more or less, he told me he was nervous, it was his 3rd time, first time not with an Asian girl, etc. and he couldn’t keep it up very well.

But it was way more fun than I anticipated, and even though he told me he wasn’t interested in continuing it like I was I’m pretty glad I did it. Sad that he was gorgeous though, and really vocal, which I love.

I’d always told myself I wouldn’t have a one-night stand, that I was fine with other people having them but it wasn’t for me. This, however, was way better than I anticipated and I think my viewpoint has changed. Just, I’d rather know beforehand that it would be a one-time thing, not get to like the guy after a night of conversation and find out 3 days later that he’s not interested. shrug

Also, this encounter pretty much solidified the fact that I love guys who are shorter than average. I was able to get him all the way in my mouth and this was only my third time going down :]

submitted by axel_val [link] [2 comments]